Red Beans & Rice

I don't eat red meat but I'm not a vegetarian
I like ice cream/ but not much dairy
'cause it gets in my nose
It makes me gotta blows
Snot like a farmer and it gets on my clothes
It's rather unsightly/ can even be frightening
But cold medication/ should not be taken nightly
Because everything dat I put in/ it comes out again
And if I eat lean/ it helps me stay thin
Check out my hair, I keep it dreaded
About my corn? I like it breaded
Hot from the oven? MMMM! you said it!
Straight to the stomach my fuel is unleaded
But not fossil fuels/ I like olive oil
I like my eggs scrambled/ I never eat 'em boiled
The way to my heart/ is with a garlic clove
It smells hella sexy/ when it's on the kitchen stove

(chorus)
Red beans and rice, red beans and rice, red beans and rice
I could eat a plate twice
Red beans and rice, red beans and rice, red beans and rice
Make everything nice
So nice. So nice. So nice

Most people on the planet/ eat beans and rice
Some can't afford beef or they think cows are nice
If you talk table manners don't believe all they
Told ya I eat with my fingers like an African soldier
I don't know which fork is for meat or for salad
I haven't got a clue when they say "whet your palate"
Eat a lot a prunes it'll keep you loose
Skin'll turn orange if you drink carrot juice
I think beef jerky tastes like a boot
When I'm on the street I chew a licorice root
And if I have a soar throat /then I eat ginger
And I will break bread /with those who are strangers
So come into my cave / tonight I will show you
Food is for life / and life I will show you
If you're havin' problems/ I invite you here
Step into my kitchen /we will cook away your fears

(chorus)

Amazing grace how sweet the sound that
Saved a wretch like me
Dammit let's eat!
Mi casa es su casa. Mi cocina es su cocina
You know what I meana!

(bridge)
Get some boilin' water! Yeah!
Get a pound of beans! Yeah!
Get some spice and make it nice! Yeah!
You know what I mean!

But if a friend has gas /then he's passin'
It gives me a headache end I gotta take aspirin
It makes me dizzy/ I fix him fizzies
To calm his stomach/ when it's feelin kinda
Busy some like it white/but I like it brown
I like spicy chicken/ and I can throw it down
Chilis come red /and chilis come green
When it's on the table/ I lick my plate clean
Then I drink a toast to the host and hostess
But first we give thanks/ to God the Mostest
'cause if I am a guest/ I always wash my plate
Sip a sip a soda while I sing Amazing Grace
Rings on my fingers /left round the tub
Bass fulla bubbles/ bumpin like a wash tub
Think about my troubles/ goin down the drain
Dryin' up the puddles in the back of my brain
But...

(chorus)

(bridge)