Positive

[Verse 1]
Makes me, make me sweat, 'till I'm wet, 'till I'm dry
But then wipe this tear from my eye
Haven't even felt this warm in a long time
Even out in the bright sunshine in a lifetime of spring times
I fall into your arms with my heart pumpin' on like a bubblin' dub track
Like a garlicky hot tongue and lip smack
I did some contemplation
Before we got down to this consecration
Well maybe baby something in your kiss said it was impetuous
For me to rethink this
If I love you, then I better get tested
Make sure we are protected
I walk through the park dressed like a question mark
Hark! I hear my memory bark
In the back of my brain
Makin' me insane, like cocaine

[Chorus]
But how'm I gonna live my life if I'm positive?
Is it gonna be a negative?
But how'm I gonna live my life if I'm positive?
But how'm I gonna live my life if I'm positive?
Is it gonna be a negative?
But how'm I gonna live my life if I'm positive?

[Verse 2]
It dawned on me, it seemed to me that this is unusual scenery
This red light greenery
Make me feel kinda dreamery
Thinkin' how I used to be
Arrive at the clinic
And walk through the front door
Take a nervous number then I think about it more
About all the time that I neglected
Making sure that I was protected
They took my blood with an anonymous number
Two weeks waitin' and wonderin'
I shoulda done this a long time ago
A lot of excuses why I couldn't go
I know these things and these things I must know
But it's better to know than to not know

[Chorus]
But how'm I gonna live my life if I'm positive?
Is it gonna be a negative?
But how'm I gonna live my life if I'm positive?
But how'm I gonna live my life if I'm positive?
Is it gonna be a negative?
But how'm I gonna live my life if I'm positive?

[Verse 3]
I go home to kick it in my apartment
I try to give myself a risk assessment
The waiting is what can really annoy ya
Every single day is more paranoia
I'm readin' about how AIDS gets transmitted
Some behavior I must admit it
Who I slept with, who they slept with
Who they, who they, who they, who they slept with
I think about life and immortality
What's the first thing I do if I'm H.I.V?
I have a cry and tell my mother
Get on the phone and call my past lovers
I never thought about infectin' another
All the times that I said "Hmmm? Don't bother."
Was it really all that magic?
The times I didn't use a prophylactic
Would my whole life have to change?
Or would my whole life remain the same?
Sometimes it makes me wanna shout
All these things too hard to think about
A day to laugh, a day to cry
A day to live and a day to die
'Till I find out, I may wonder
But I'm not gonna live my life six feet under

[Chorus]
Cause how'm I gonna live my life if I'm positive?
Is it gonna be a negative?
And how'm I gonna live my life if I'm positive?
And how'm I gonna live my life if I'm positive?
Is it gonna be a negative?
And how'm I gonna live my life if I'm positive?