Preparations (Off-Broadway Version)

[PIERRE]
Ah, Anatole
Where are you off to?

[ANATOLE]
Pierre, good man,
Tonight I go away, on an adventure
You'll not be seeing me for some time
I've found a new pleasure
And I'm taking her away
I'll send you a letter from Poland

[PIERRE]
Ha! An elopement!
Fool, you are married already!

[ANATOLE]
Don't talk to me of that!
I will not deprive myself of this one
Tonight!
I take her tonight!Lend me fifty rubles?

[PIERRE]
Ah, that's a true sage
Living in the moment
What I wouldn't give to be like him

[DOLOKHOV]
The plan for Natalie Rostova's abduction
Had all been arranged
And the preparations made
On the day that Sonya decided to save her,
That was the day
That the game was to be played
Natasha was to be on her back porch at ten,
Anatole and his troika
Would scoop her up, and then
They'd ride forty miles
To the village of Kamenka,
Where an unfrocked priest
Was to make them get wed
Then back into the troika, off they'd go—
Take the Poland highroad
To the wedding bed

[ANATOLE]
Passports, horses,Ten-thousand rubles I have taken from my sister
And another ten-thousand
Raised with Dolokhov's help

[DOLOKHOV]
We were gathered in my study,
drinking up some tea,
Just Anatole,
The two wedding witnesses, and me
An abacus and paper money
Strewn on the desk
Persian rugs and bearskins hanging grotesque
Anatole was walking
With his uniform unbuttoned,
Walking to and fro,
To and fro,
To and fro,
To and fro,
To and fro,
To and fro,
To and fro,

[ANATOLE & DOLOKHOV]
To and fro,
To and fro,
To and fro,
To and fro

[DOLOKHOV]
Now, wait!
You better just
Give it up now,
Why don't you?
While there's still time!
You'd really better drop it all
Give it up, now,
While there's still time!
Do you know—

[ANATOLE]
What, teasing again?
Fool don't talk nonsense!
Go to the devil! Eh? Really!
This is no time for your stupid jokes!

[DOLOKHOV]
I am not joking, I am talking sense
This is serious business,
A dangerous business
Come here, come here,
Come here, Anatole!
Why would I joke about it,
Me of all people?
Who found the priest,
Raised the money,
Got the passports,
Got the horses?

[ANATOLE]
And well I thank you for it,
Do you think that I am not grateful?

[DOLOKHOV]
And now you'll carry her away,
But will they let it stop there?
You haven't thought this through,
Or do you just don't care?
Now listen to me tell it to you one last time,
They will take you to the court
And convict you for your crime
Already married
And you're playing with a little girl
Don't you know,
Don't you think,
Don't you know?

[ANATOLE]
Nonsense, nonsense!
I'm scowling and grimacing
Didn't I explain it to you,
Didn't I, what?

[DOLOKHOV]
And here, Anatole,
With the stubborn attachment
Small-minded people have
For conclusions they've worked out
For themselves
Repeated his argument to me for the
Hundredth time

[ANATOLE]
If this marriage isn't valid,
Then I'm off the hook,
But if it is valid,
It really doesn't matter—
No one abroad is gonna know a thing about it,
Isn't that so, now, don't you know?
Don't talk to me,
Don't, don't
What, what!
Ah, go to hell, now,
I'm a-clutching my hair
It's the very devil!
Here, feel how it beats!

Ah, mon cher, mon cher,
Quel pied, quel regard!
What a foot she has,
A glance!
A goddess!

And my handsome lips
Mutter something tender to myself

It's time,
It's time!
Now then! Nearly ready?
You're dawdling!
The driver is here
The driver is here
Balaga is here!