One-Woman Show

Was it worth shattering both patellas for that... that B-minus laugh? I don't think so. I don't think so. What do you think, Birdbath? What do you think? Okay, okay...

She just gave me a thumbs-up, it was such, like, a Roman... king... (thumbs up) "He lives. She lives." I hope you don't keep doing that throughout the... so what if I look and it's... (thumbs down)

I'm gonna take this off, I'm gonna take this- I will not be objectified, thank you very much! I'm gonna put this right here. Mm... no, that's a little too one-woman show-y, isn't it?

One woman show- Can we do a blackout after this? This is a one-woman show.

I'm Italian, trust me. One second, Greg! I said one second, Greg. Greg wasn't like the other guys. He could see that I was Italian. He didn't mind when I... poured marinara sauce in my glovе compartment and stored it therе, and whenever I opened it it would spill on me like I was some kind of Italian Carrie. Greg could drive. God, could he drive... too bad he was married.

"And how's everybody feeling today?" What if I could do that? Standing ovation. That's jiu-jitsu shit right there, that's... you gotta be a samurai for that. Oh, you saw my gold tips? Okay, well, at least it's not a live- at least it's a dress rehearsal, alright, let's get this... belts are for narcs!