Never Had A Chance (Piñata Boy)

[Intro]
Alright, this is a formal disclaimer; hahaha! Oh my gosh this song is stupid. I mean it doesn't even sound that good to be honest. I don't even know what I was doing when I wrote this. So, I can't be held accountable, it was... I don't know

[Verse 1]
Why do I do the things that I do daily?
Its crazy, I use the excuse its the way that God made me
But I-I-I'm nuts
I fully admit it I committed myself for shucks
What am I supposed to do? How do I continue with these problems?
Do I sit out on the corner rambling on and on
About Vietnam and Soviet nuclear bombing
If you cracked open my skull all you'd see is top ramen
I do things that don't make sense period
I grab fresh piles of dog crap and sculpt pyramids
I don't know who the dude in my mirror is
I tell people I'm Ghandi, "Whats so bad about that?" I'm serious
See, I don't know what happened
But I guess when I came out and the nurse said slap him
The doctor held me up, cocked back a bat and
Started bashing, hard as he could laughing

[Hook]
They call me Piñata Boy
I was beaten as a baby and they never told me why
There wasn't even anything inside
Now they call me Piñata Boy
I never had a chance at a normal
Upbringing, I was beaten since the day I was born

[Verse 2]
Now, now, now, don't get it twisted
I use to not even know if I existed
But now I do, so I guess that's progress
I'm just on a trip I have not come off yet
I walk into clubs and creep up to the bar
And slip a chick the pill, and get her back to my car
Get in the drivers side and unlock her door
And before she even gets in, put it in gear and floor it
Its a sad fact I can't ignore it
I sun bathe when its 55 degrees and pouring
I stand on hills and start screaming for Lauren
I think libraries are fun and hockey games are boring
My hairs orange, I stole Papa Bear's porridge
Did Mama Bear, scurried off into the forest
So now I can't go back to candy land I'm far, far away cause I got warrants

[Hook]
They call me Piñata Boy
I was beaten as a baby and they never told me why
There wasn't even anything inside
Now they call me Piñata Boy
I never had a chance at a normal
Upbringing, I was beaten since the day I was born

[Verse 3]
My voice is raspy so I'm gonna calm it down
Let me tell you all about when I was young and almost drowned
There was a big canal, with some kite string across it
I blind folded myself and tried to tight rope walk it
I couldn't swim, they pulled me out black and purple
I received mouth to mouth resuscitation from a huge snapping turtle
I woke up and slipped it the tongue (come on man, gosh)
What? I thought it was Wendy from the sand lot
When I was young I thought Santa was the enemy
So I filled up my chimney, with black widows and centipedes
That faggot wasn't even real, you think its funny
I left a 6 foot mouse trap for the Easter Bunny
My mom lost her legs
They found her in a pool of blood, and chocolate eggs
And now she walks with pegs, that's what she gets her freaking doctors gay

Yea, the one who delivered me. The one that hit me with the bat. You know like I said earlier in the song. Yea, he was the reason they call me..

[Hook]
They call me Piñata Boy
I was beaten as a baby and they never told me why
There wasn't even anything inside
Now they call me Piñata Boy
I never had a chance at a normal
Upbringing, I was beaten since the day I was born
I never had a chance at a normal (had a chance at a normal)
I never had a chance at a normal (had a chance at a normal)
I never had a chance at a normal (had a chance at a normal)
I never had a chance at a normal
Upbringing I was beaten since the day I was born