Monty Python and the Holy Grail (”Camelot Song”)

Fairly close HEAD-ON SHOT of the KNIGHTS riding along. BEDEVERE and ARTHUR
at the front of the group deep in conversation.

BEDEVERE
And that, my lord, is how we know the Earth to be banana-shaped.

ARTHUR
This new learning amazes me, Sir Bedevere. Explain again how
sheep's bladders may be employed to prevent earthquakes.

BEDEVERE
OF course, my Liege ...

LAUNCELOT
(he points)
Look, my liege!

They all stop and look.

ARTHUR
(with thankful reverence)
Camelot!

CUT TO shot of amazing castle in the distance. Illuminated in the rays of
the setting sun.

Music.

CUT BACK TO ARTHUR and the group. They are all staring with fascination.

GALAHAD
Camelot ...

LAUNCELOT
Camelot ...

GAWAIN
(at the back, to PAGE)
It's only a model.

ARTHUR
(turning sharply)
Sh!
(to the rest)
Knights! I bid you welcome to your new home! Let us ride ...
to Camelot.

8 INTERIOR - NIGHT

CUT TO interior of medieval hall.
A large group of armoured KNIGHTS are engaged in a well choreographed song-and-dance routine of the very up-beat
'If they could see me now' type of fast bouncy number. The poorer verses
are made clearer by CUTTING to a group of knights actually engaged in
the described task while the line itself is sung. They sing:

KNIGHTS
We're knights of the round table
We dance whene'er we're able
We do routines and chorus scenes
With footwork impeccable.
We dine well here in Camelot
We eat ham and jam and spam a lot.

We're knights of the Round Table
Our shows are formidable
But many times
We're given rhymes
That are quite unsingable
We're opera mad in Camelot
We sing from the diaphragm a lot.

Booming basses. A routine where two XYLOPHONISTS play parts of KNIGHTS'
armour producing a pleasing effect.

In war we're tough and able.
Quite indefatigable
Between our quests
We sequin vests
And impersonate Clark Gable
It's a busy life in Camelot.

SINGLE MAN
I have to push the pram a lot.

CUT BACK TO ARTHUR and BEDEVERE and COMPANY as we had left them.

ARTHUR
No, on second thought, let's not go to Camelot.

KNIGHTS
Right!

ARTHUR
It is a silly place.