Lili’s Address

[All]
Puff we now ourselves with pride
Swelling outward far and wide
For God Herself is on our side
With heaven's plan for the motherland

"All right, all right ladies
Settle down now, settle down"

[Lili Corbet]
Now, the usual formalities
Everyone, hold all your questions please
You'll all have your opportunities to
Shoot the breeze or cut the cheese

But upon this juncture I must state
How immensely you appreciate
The illusion of grandeur I create
When every trait I overrate
And every word gesticulate
In praise of the motherland

[All]
Puff we now ourselves with pride
Swelling outward far and wide
For God Herself is on our side
With heaven's plan for the motherland

[Lili]
Quiet please, quiet, I'm still speaking

Irregardless of to what we pledge
The electorate gives me the edge
And the boost to my ego can't be measured
Ruling you is such a pleasure

Speaking of good taste in dames
I submit to you my list of names
Maybe some of them come up short on brains
But good at diplomatic games
And sycophantic without shame
I give you the cabinet

[Women of the Cabinet]
The privilege is strictly ours
To have you watch while we devour
The crumbs of presidential power
That we can grub from Lili

She's got the wardrobe we adore
Her teeth are perfect, what is more
She knows what having friends is for
We're silly over Lili
Silly over Lili
'Til we're ill, we'll sing it shrilly

[All]
Lili is the nation's pride
And we love her like a mother

[Lili]
Oh, you like me, you like me, oh, oh

You don't know what this means to me
To be the one you run to see when
You need a mother

All right, I feel good
I'm French
I'm ready to take you all on
First question please

(Lili fields questions from the press)

[The Press Corps]
Tell us PM, tell us PM
Can you confirm the rumors going 'round?
For the record one time PM
Germs of truth are being spread around

Sources state
That the Archbishop's hiding some
Thing of interest, something of interest

Sources state
Maybe you're just a puppet of
Special interest, some special interest
Special interest, some special interest

[A Somewhat Butch Group of Wymin]
We would like to know your posture please
On the hard line's platform policies
Like providing free to all the nation
Mandatory mass castration

[A Fundamentally Religious Group of Women]
On behalf of common decency
The Judeo-Christian society
Wants to guarantee a pregnancy
To anyone past twenty-three
Anyone past twenty three
Guarantee a pregnancy to...

[Lili]
All right, all right, all right, all right, simmer down ladies
Now you're all gonna get an answer to your questions:
Ah, ah, yes, yes, no, maybe, no, maybe, not a wink, I wasn't there, I don't recall, the dog ate it
Now I certainly hope that clears up the air
And we can get on with some important business now

[Press Corps]
Tell us PM, tell us PM
We've got fresh ugly rumors going 'round

[Special Interest Groups]
On behalf of common decency
(mandatory mass castration)
The Judeo-Christian Society...
(mandatory mass castration)

[Press Corps]
For the record one time PM
Do you flatly deny that you're involved?

[Jack Ramsay's Old Dad]
For the sake of party unity
I've some photographs you'd like to see

(All hell breaks loose. In desperation, Lili once again invokes the National Anthem)

[All]
Puff we now ourselves with pride
Swelling outward far and wide
For God Herself is on our side
Since time began
It's heaven's plan for the Mother...

(A shot rings out as Lili slumps over the dais. Pandemonium reigns.)