Jacquelyn Hyde

Corn syrup! We're breaking up
The doctor explained it: I'm old as Tut
I'm supposed to take pills that mitigate triglycerides
Seems we're at a crossroads, you and I
Dated for decades, built up trust
Might have loved sugar better but it wasn't discussed;
We had an agreement: you'd be in everything, I'd eat it
But you lied when you said you'd be all that I needed

[Hook x2, Vocal: Ken Flagg]
She had means, I don't need to say it
She had dreams I was only in the way of

I pleaded with you, PS2, don't leave me
You had a change of heart for a while (which was deceiving)
I looked deep inside of you, fine-tuned a lens
Left the screws off, thought we could just be friends
Maybe hook up on occasion, for old times' sake
But you won't mount a disc now, boot to heartache
It's just not the same between us, so scat
When your emulator's old enough, I'm ravishing that

[Hook x2]

Prosperity, I've had it, get thee hence
Better break it off early, not risk suspense
Let a new generation learn to live with fence
And windows with bars and bats that make dents
In heads and... yikes, the lean times are scary!
I changed my mind prosperity, let's stay married!
You've already given up on me? But what of lubs?
The way you turn on a dime, you're not who I thought you was

[Hook x2]

Ear infection, I feel betrayed
You used to come visit a lot, plus you stayed
Now it's like I don't know you, call you Jacquelyn Hyde.
My ear's safe and warm yet you wander outside
Where'd you sleep last night? Should I guess?
Doesn't hurt when I burp: I'm without your distress
How'd you do me like this? That's it. We're not together
How's it my fault, for taking up with eardrops? Whatever

[Hook x2]

California! Listen, we're breaking up
I know I left my heart in the heart of you, but
I can't keep from feeling push came to shove
And you undid the part I was proudest to love
California, I'll still visit I promise
Not least among charms, you're the place where my mom is
And I'll be back. Get your votes rearranged
Till then, we can't date. It's your fault, you changed