I Saw A Dragon

[[LAMPY]]
A dragon! A dragon!
I swear I saw a dragon!
A green and seething fire-breathing monster is in sight
With eyes so red, a lion's head and wings as black as night
He has a jaw of gleaming teeth! He's fifty feet in height!
It's true! It's true!
Oh, what are we to do?
It's true! It's true!
He's break us all in two!
Oh, he's coming in, his great big fin is right against the door
So board up all the windows And get down on the floor!

A dragon! A dragon!
I swear I saw a dragon!
His tail lashing, he'll be smashing every shop in town
With scaly feet, he'll crack the street and tear the steeple down
It's not some loony dream, I heard a scream from Sheriff Brown!
It's true! It's true!
Oh, what are we to do?
It's true! It's true!
Ol' Lampy's in a stew!

[[TAVERN PATRONS]]
A dragon! A dragon!
Ol' Lampy saw a dragon!

[[PATRON]]
(spoken)
He's bleary-eyed!-

[[PATRON]]
(spoken)
He's ossified!-

[[PATRON]]
(spoken)
He's tighter than a tick!

[[TAVERN PATRONS]]
He had too much to drink today so call the doctor quick

[[NORA]]
(spoken)
I better take him home to be before you make him sick!

[[LAMPY]]
We're sunk! We're sunk!-

[[PATRON]]
(spoken)
Go on with ya, you're drunk!

[[TAVERN PATRONS]]
A dragon! A dragon!
He says he saw a dragon!

[[NORA]]
(spoken)
The game is done, you've had your fun, my dad's been through enough
So won't you all behave yourselves? I don't want any guff
You're like a bunch of little boys who play at being tough
You'll see! You'll see!

[[LAMPY]]
Oh, you always jeer and laugh and sneer but look across the square!

[[TAVERN PATRONS]]
All right, we'll go and take a look

Good lord!

Good lord

There's ab-so-lute-ly...... nothing anywhere!

[[LAMPY]]
(spoken)
It was there!
(sung)
A dragon! A dragon!
I swear there was a dragon!

[[TAVERN PATRONS]]
You're off your hinges. All those binges put you in a haze

[[NORA]]
(spoken)
You crazy fools, it's all your doggone fault he's in a daze!
Let go of me! Let go of me! Amend your wicked ways!

[[TAVERN PATRONS]]
What makes you think there ever was-
You know there never
Never, never, never, never
Never, never, never, never
Never, ever was a dragon!

A dragon!