I need to vent (interlude)

It's fucking raining
So it's been a few days now
Since everything happened
And I know if she hears this she's probably fucking rolling her eyes
I'm actually alright
Fucking angry, definitely felt that
But I have so much support, that I can't even like complain

It's like
When you have a friend go behind your back
And just fucking not give a fuck
And try to get with the girl you were in love with
Like right after things went to shit
It's just like not an easy fucking thing to deal with, so

I'm not fucking bitch mode and complaining about nothing either
This isn't just like
Fuck
And he knew it would piss me off, that's why he kept it secret
That's the fucked up part

Well, I am done holding back what I feel
And what I think
Because I've done it, and it didn't do me any good

This fucking rain is loud, man
I tried to do this before
I tried to record my thoughts and just play it back
But I think at the time I think I was very, very
Attached, not that I'm not anymore
But I'm chilling, like
Still like a little
A little pissed off
And feel like my trust has obviously been toyed with once again
This isn't even the fucking first time
So, so

But it's not easy
I'll tell you that, so
I just do what I feel like I'm best at
I just fucking write and make something out of it
I felt very optimistic for a split second the other day
And it comes and goes
And I really do believe that something really good is gonna come out of this shit
It just has to man

I don't know, I believe it
I believe in me at this point I have to
I just believe it
I hope it's what you wanted
Cause I know everything's gonna be alright
And I'll be fine
Fuck the heartbreak
It's fine, I've been through it
Whatever