I’m Sorry, I Got No Words

To those who I left back in Spain
I’m sorry
Every friend I’ve ever left in pain
I’m sorry
To my mother when disappointment reigns
I’m sorry
To those I’ve hurt and made tears rain
I’m sorry
To my siblings who hate me more than love me
I’m sorry
To the people that I’ve stabbed when they tried to hug me
I’m sorry
To the people with whom I didn’t put in the effort to restore things
I’m sorry
I’m sorry...

Yeah I take it back
Take it all back
Hate I don’t need that
Got me blinded gotta open my eyes up and see that
See what?
Hard to see when you blindfold your own mind
Own heart
No heart
Broke heart
Done
I try so hard
Blowhard
Go hard
Hopes are
None
What you gonna do
When your life is built on lies
And never mind your plans there’s no space for the truth
But forget your ideas and plans the truth’ll make room for itself
As a rapper wanna sell my thoughts but it’s hard when there aren’t any more words in stock
Got an empty shelf
I’m nothing but an empty shell
Full of corruption and anger
Not gonna lie I’m scared of hell
Scared of myself
Scared there’s nobody else
Willing to love me and lay it all on the line and sacrifice themselves
I’m sorry
I tried
To not try
I lied
To all of y’all and
I cry
Because look how broken I am
Look how broken we are!
Look how broken I am
Look how broken

But how to ask someone to sacrifice their own wish
Got me trippin' wondering how I came to be so selfish
Shellfish
Got a better grip on life than me
I scream I don’t even know what I’m working towards
I got no words
No words
I got no words
All I got is hurt
All I am is cursed
All I touch gets worse
All I wanna do is blurt
Out that I’m done and don’t know what to say
Hope that my Lord and Savior got me get me to a better place
Better wait
Before you trust in me
I don’t deserve any of your faith
I deserve every little bit of your hate
Other day I dreamt
I slit my wrist let the blood just bleed away
God covered up my cuts and healed my pain
I screamed because healing was against my wish
I took a moment stepped back and all my claims
Vanish at the sight of His greatness on high the great
I’m a witness He wiped away all of my hurts
I looked up at him and said “ Lord I got no words”
I got no words
I got no hurt
I am not cursed
Better no longer all worse
The glory I felt washed over me
I woke up in bed feeling cursed again it was all a dream
So I promise you I won’t stop searching
A way to end my anger
To end my pride
To no longer endanger
The love I have for others’ lives
I’ll keep searching for a path
For a way
For a road
Because y’all know
It hurts
I’m out of words