I Don’t Care About Award Shows

(Song)
[RACHEL]
I don't care about award shows
They have nothing to do with art

(Spoken)
[ALINE]
I'm so sorry

(Song)
[RACHEL]
I don't need to beg for some acclaim
To desperately build my fame
I write and sing and act to be a part
Of a community of people who value integrity

I don't care about award shows
I don't need the shallow praise
I don't have the inkling of a yen
I'd rather sit in my den
Wearing black and reading ancient Grecian plays

All the world's a stage
And all the men are only players
So why would a hunk of tin
Be in my prayers?
I only pray about emotions
Or when to use a comma
And when I pray, I pray to Dionysus
The Greek god of drama
That's right, I pray to Greek gods
I'm classically trained

I don't care about award shows
Or wearing gowns like this
I'd rather act Chekhov
Than answer a heck of a lot of
Red carpet questions about who's the most fun to kiss
(The answer's Ryan.)

I don't care about award shows
The only award I care about
Is the one for not caring about award shows
And for that I am so proud

(Spoken)
[PRESENTER]
That award kinda looks like an Emmy

(Song)
[RACHEL]
Well, that's just happenstance

[PRESENTER]
Ow!

[RACHEL]
I don't care about award shows
Oh, and I'd like to thank the fans

(Spoken)
[RACHEL]
And I'd also like to thank Zeus, Aphrodite, Les Moonves, and the guy who wrote Notting Hill