Halloween on Military Street

[Intro: Brother Theodore]
We measure things by what we are
To the maggots in the cheese, the cheese is the universe
To the worms in the corpse, the corpse is the cosmos
How then can we be so cock-sure about our world?
Just because of our telescopes, microscopes and the splitting of the atom?
Certainly not
Science is but an organized system of ignorance
There are more things in Heaven and on Earth that are dreamt of in your philosophy
What do we know about the beyond?
Do we know whats behind the beyond?
I'm afraid some of us hardly know whats beyond the behind

[Chorus]
Fuck! Damnit! Another Halloween
People on Military know what this means
Houses on fire, they're blowin up cars
Creatures in the streets, and razor blades in candy bars

[Verse: Violent J]
I went to trick-or-treat the first house on my block
Spit in my face and gave me a rock
I tried to give it back and said "I'll take nothing instead"
Turned around and walked away and felt the rock peg me in the head
Walked to the next house directly next door
There I saw an old lady dead on the floor
I said "Excuse me miss, but do you have a treat?"
She lifted her leg and scraped flakes off her dead feet
I ran to the next house happy and giddy
And there I seen a fat woman holding up her titty
I said, "Trick-or-treat." she sad "Treat-or-trick."
And squeezed on her titty until it... fuck it, it's too sick
Next house up was sittin back in the woods
I was a lil frightened but fuck I want the goods
I knocked on the door I heard a knock back
And then I heard "COME IN" and yo I'm like FUCK THAT
This house belongs to Miss Cherry Spoon
She said "Drop your drawers and your treat is coming soon"
I quickly grew a stiffy, but kept my eyes shut
A hand came out the mail chute and flicked me in the nuts
I wobbled to the next house ready for the worst
And chillin in the drive was a long black hearse
I rang the door bell and said "Is anybody home?"
"Of course little boy have a sugar-coated kidney stone"
I walked through the field, and to the next crib
It's friendly Mrs. Wetherbee in her cooking bib
I said "How bout some candy." she said "How bout instead
A nice hot fresh home made loaf of yeast infection bread?"
My bag's gettin heavy so I rest on the curb
And riding on his bike here comes little Larry Sherb
I snuck up behind him and kicked him off his seat
I punched him in the neck, and powerbombed him in the street
Now my bag of candy has doubled in size
Up to the next house for my scary prize
I'm like trick-or-treat, trick treat tricky dick
He opened up his door slapped my lips and didn't give me shit
Rock through his window and ran across the street
To the big mansion I'm in for a treat
I dinged on the dong, and here comes the butler
A big gumpy tall-ass Lurch lookin motherfucker
I said "Hello Mr. is there somethin for my sack?"
He reached in his pocket but I think he hurt his back
It's taking him an hour, my bag is open ready
But then he finally dropped it in my sack, a fucking penny
The next house is abandoned so forget it
But wait a minute, I think somebody's livin in it
I ran up to the door "Trick-or-treat, you can't hide"
It was a crackhead, he crawled in my bag and died
The next house is mine the last on the block
My mother's sitting on the porch shining up her Glock
I climbed on the roof with my brother Jump Steady
And we yelled "HAPPY HALLOWEEN AND CLOWN LOVE!"
To the whole city

[Chorus 'til fade]