Hair Club

Pain supreme, keep the open cut clean
But only where there's hair otherwise it doesn't count
But even if there's not an open cut anywhere
Put a band-aid on, pull it slow and shout
Eyebrows seem to be one of the best
Or if you got a hairy chest slap one on there too
Then peel it off, nice and slow
It's a whole new experience every time you do
It's a rush of pain, all through your head
You shout and scream like you know karate
This is a song for people who enjoy
Rippin' band-aids off hairy parts of your body

[Chorus]
So join the Hair Club
Rip it off
C'mon join the Hair Club
Rip it off

When you're alone in your house and there's nothing to do
The medicine cabinet holds all the fun
Call up your friends grab a stack of band-aids
You'll thank me for this when the fun's begun
When you first start doing this
Hair on your arms and legs will do just fine
But when you feel that it's time to move on
A beard and a moustache will blow your mind
This is an experience you'll never forget
It soon will set your mind at ease
And if you feel like becoming an artist
Nasal hairs are a masterpiece
Give it a try you got nothing to lose
Even if you're embarrassed don't be scared to blush
Tear it on off, slow or fast
Underarm hair is a hell of a rush

[Chorus]

Give it some time and I'm sure you'll meet
People who enjoy ripping band-aids off
They're very laid back worked out frustration
They're always clean shaven and their skin is soft
Other people think that they're all masochists
But it's no different then using Epilady
I beg to differ from the popular opinion
I'm sane, it's the rest of the world who's crazy
Band-aids here shove a band-aid there
Shove a band-aid anywhere it'll fit
And the final step, for experts only
Pubic hair is the ultimate

[Chorus]