Flowermother

My wrist keep dripping
I know I will never be anything to you everyday
I pray take my agony away
Pain let me tell you about Pain
Pain is waking up but not be awake
Its ptsd everytime my heart breaks it's watching your family burn from the inside and being the last alive
Its dying but all you wanna do is thrive its being stabbed in the same place in the back
But at a different time
See I was young didn't know what grief was then i opened up for the first time
I felt everything at once I didn't wanna cut once but once wasn't enough so cuts bled til I couldn't feel nothin I started runnin running away so I wouldn't feel this pain speeding fast so the voices owuld fade that called me insane I didn't know my name didn't know if I was alone n why I felt this shame everybody's dead so no one to claim I dont want fame I dont want fakes you see friends I see snakes you see likes I see spies you wanna kill I wanna die I turned sadness Into poetic features inside my mind I developed this habit like a creature to push everyone away I didn't want anyone to care not that they would anyway I gave them music so when I'm gone the know my story but i only hope they dont act like they know me and that's jade, yeah that's the old me

I want you to save , for me
A little bit of pain, for me
You never saved me
I can't bleed so easily
I want you to save , for me
A little bit of pain, for me
You never saved me
I can't bleed so easily
I want you to save , for me
A little bit of pain, for me
You never save me
I can't bleed so easily

Bet you hated all of me guess I shouldn't have gave for free scars on the outside , poor me killing all I used to be
Just to hang on to what i wanna be
Left with my devices
Sins and virtues , all I ever hated
Was the fact I could never hurt you
Wanted to curse you
Never could disert you
Everything in my mind
Was focused on why I couldn't revert from u
Guess it's over, in the end I'll always be sober my hearts broken but that's not what happened in october