Every Time a Bell Rings

Ground Control to Monty Don
The testimonial silver's gone
The circumstance here's pretty thin
The sun comes out when I go in

On the way home from spinning class she pops into the deli for artisan gossip. He stays in the car, leafing through a high-end coffee bean catalogue. Their dream is to open up a roastery in the Keswick area

Get your hedge cut
Get your fuckin' hedge cut
Get your hedge cut
Get your fuckin' hedge cut
Stop meeting friends
And cut your hedge

Why can't you say 'orangutan'
Why can't you just say Ku Klux Klan
Who needs the library or the pub
When we've got your creative hub

He got a Boardman bike on the 'Cycle to Work' scheme. Discovered he really enjoyed it. Started watching the Tour de France highlights on ITV4; worshipped at the altar of Wiggo and Froome-dog. Goes out every Sunday in full Sky replica kit

Get your hedge cut
Get your fuckin' hedge cut
Get your hedge cut
Get your fuckin' hedge cut
Stop analysing Strava
And cut your hedge

It's a wonderful life
(It's a wonderful film, but the more I watch it the more I want Potter to succeed, not least when that lot up the road come out into the street every New Year's Eve, drunk on Ptolemy's Hock, hugging each other and going 'hee-haw-hee-hawww'...)

Every time a bell rings
I hate you some more
Every time a bell rings
I hate you some more
Every time a bell rings
I hate you some more
Every time a bell rings