Deep End

Last night I broke, something finally snapped
I'm in a corner trapped, you spoke I smoked and sat
Still soaking wet, reckon, I'd die if I'm mistaken
It was all in vain for the sane I've forsaking

Every one I know is insane
They've got madness in the brain
Going, going, gone of the deep end
On the edge of profane, profound pain
Suck down Tylenol 3 if ever I'm at all free

Nobody called to say they cared
Going bald, having bared my soul
I pull my hair until I tear the roots out
Why do I doubt? I can't control my mind
Follow the line, falling behind it's all in my mind

Man, it's happening all the time, I didn't wake up inspired
I haven't even slept yet. I'm not tired
I'm wide awake for another night of walking the thin wires
Between the demons and the genius this inspires
I am slowly going crazy, 6, 5, 4, 3, 2, 1 spit

Sweat dripping from my lip and I can feel myself slipping
Into states beyond your grip and on cue I do a back flip
And find myself drifting into lifting off looking off a cliff
And thinking should I jump, when something starts to happen
It creeps its way through my circuits
When it works its way in deeper

Doing all nighters, and all too often I can't sleep
The grim reaper cometh, spreading seeded plague
Screaming I'll bring the demon, you bring the egg
I just want to touch your sanity, begging on my knees
Please relieve me of what's left of my vanity
And what's that sound? Eyes bugging out of head

Can't stop brain please shut down
For once and leave me alone in this hallway
All night and all day, I'll pay rent and live in the hallway
So say those who turned to god and swayed as they prayed
With frayed rope I let go and watched it all fade away

As I nervously waited finding my way to breach surface
Elated with each purpose, glad we made it
She seemed so seemlessly sedated
With senseless fists clenched
The stench overwhelming, my whole body tensed

Wrench the monkey from my back
Pack my bags, soak the rags in gas
Take a last look back and
(Blast off)
Then
(Black out)
I pop pills
(On the 1)
To stop chills running up my spine

Everyday's a little better I lose a little more of my mind
My tidal wave emotions pave the hopeless stain
Blood is spreading through the grain and growing into flowers
Turning everything it touches that is plain into powers
That initiate change like cold showers in the rain

On whose broken maimed streets I've lain in your dirt
On whose shoes I spit shined but never called it work
On whose shirt I've both bled and cried on
On whose walls I write my name with a can of red krylon

I wanna get beyond the long arm of the law and boot
The cops from the corners and the doctors from the clinics
Get in free win a new Saturn, see a pattern yet?
Apparently you're not a doctor

Give me my methadone, you're not so hot
You can't be touched, such thoughts should be stricken
From the records sick of everybody's questions
Let me ask you this, you ever lost your mind?
And gone blind but didn't mind
The mining of your mind for diamonds

When I'm in the business of making what's yours
Mine and my mind is mine and I've lost it, 6, 5, 4, 3, 2, 1 spit
I need a new pearl of wisdom for this black cloud to follow
I act proud and swallow pride intact
Although I'm not allowed to wallow on the inside

I act introverted but I made a pact with laughter
And so perverted, the very thoughts that the doctor's were
After until disaster struck I was the king of the castle
The slave and the vassal

The ways of the mistress and masters
Crazed craving for power's that's what I'm after
So I need a new pearl of wisdom curled up position hazy
Spin the wheel, feel the real fade
And kiss the closest thing you know to crazy

Last night I broke, something finally snapped
I'm in a corner trapped, you spoke I smoked and sat
Still soaking wet knowing that this moment was sacred
Shivering shaking in the dark stark naked
Still soaking wet reckon I'd die if I'm mistaken
It was all in vain for the sane I've forsaking