Beach City Drift

[Opn Ext. It's a Wash]

(Steven is seen sitting inside a car, wearing sunglasses and monologuing to himself.)

STEVEN: They told me there wasn't enough room on the road for the universe. And I told them, the universe is my road.

(Steven shifts the gears in the car, steps down on the accelerator pedal, and pretends to drive the car.)

STEVEN: Vroom, vroom!

CONNIE: starts knocking the window of the car Steven? Steven?

STEVEN: lowers the window and takes off his sunglasses* Oh, hey, Connie! *gets off the car Thanks for letting me practice, Dad. This car's great! But I think it might be too small to live in.

GREG: Ah, the van's still home sweet home. I just thought now that I'm swimming in dough, why not get a new car?

CONNIE: A new car? But it's got this big "Used" sticker on it.

GREG: I like to think of it as more experienced than "used".

(Greg takes out another sticker, reading "Dad On Board", and pastes it over the "Used" sticker)

GREG: This baby's a Dondai Supremo from the era of frosted tips, mood rings, slap bracelets.

(Steven and Connie stare at Greg cluelessly.)

GREG: You know, before you kids were born.

CONNIE: What a time to be alive.

GREG: I've had my eye on the Dondai since way back when.

(Greg begins showing Steven and Connie a series of photos of a younger him next to a brand new Dondai.)

GREG: I loved that car. I wanted that car.

(Connie and Steven look at the photos awkwardly as they reveal the younger Greg "making out" with the car and then getting apprehended by security. Greg then toss all the photos away.)

GREG: Also, these things are crazy on the road. gets in the car Front wheel suspension, tons of ponies. But best of all... It has a tape deck! (Greg inserts a tape into the tape deck.)

(Greg inserts a cassette tape into the tape deck and chill music begins to play. Greg starts air-guitaring, and Steven and Connie giggle together. They then pick up sponges and start cleaning the Dondai, when Steven notices the water in a bucket rippling. He looks up and see a yellow-colored sports car approaching, playing loud rock music. Greg, Steven and Connie gasp in shock as the sports car drifts and skids in front of the car wash, causing Steven and Connie to cough from the dust clouds created. The car window lowers, revealing Kevin to be the driver.)

KEVIN: Give me a wash, old man.

GREG: Uh, right away, young man. picks a sponge and runs towards Kevin

CONNIE: Is that...?

STEVEN: Kevin...! squeezes his sponge in fury

(Greg begins scrubbing the sports car when Kevin talks on his phone.)

KEVIN: on his phone* I didn't say iron the socks. I said I want my socks pressed. *turns to Greg* Whoa- Wait, wait. Careful with the tires, Grandpa. I got a big race today, and my car has to look as beautiful as me. *winks

STEVEN: rushes in between Greg and Kevin Back off, Kevin! He's not a Grandpa! He's just a regular Pa!

(Kevin turns off his phone and looks intently at Steven.)

KEVIN: Have we met before? I think I'd remember a twerp like you.

STEVEN: You do remember a twerp like me!

(Connie runs towards Steven, laughing nervously.)

CONNIE: nervously You- You just look like another guy we know.

KEVIN: That's impossible. There's only one... Kevin!

(Kevin then speeds off in his sports car without even paying Greg.)

GREG: Hey! He forgot to... Eh, what do I care? looks down gloomy I'm rich.

STEVEN: growls angrily I hate Kevin!

GREG: Whoa, whoa, whoa! Watch the four letters, schtu-ball. Hate's a strong word.

STEVEN: It's a strong feeling too.

GREG: Do you know that guy?

CONNIE: Well, kinda. When we fused into Stevonnie, we met him at the dance and-

STEVEN: He was a creep!

GREG: Steven!

STEVEN: That's five letters!

CONNIE: He kept asking us to dance with him, even though we said no. It was really... uncomfortable.

STEVEN: He didn't even care about how we felt. At all!

GREG: sighs in exasperation I had no idea that happened. I'm... really sorry. That guy, he's not even worth the time of day. Don't even give him the satisfaction of thinking about him.

CONNIE: Thanks, Mr. Universe.

(Steven looks down in anger.)

[Time-Skip - Dusk]

(Steven and Connie are lying on the hood of the Dondai and gazing at the sky. Steven then sighs deeply in frustration.)

CONNIE: Still mad about Kevin?

STEVEN: Yes...!

CONNIE: Me too.

STEVEN: sits up You don't seem mad.

CONNIE: I'm thinking mad. sits up too I still feel like there's something big I want to say to him, you know? Something to make him think, like we're thinking.

STEVEN: Yeah. Too bad we can't just... race against him. To use the first place ribbon to wipe that smug look off his face!

CONNIE: But we're kids. Kids can't drive. That's against the law.

STEVEN: ...We weren't kids when we met Kevin. glances at Connie with an inspiration

CONNIE: smirks I smell what you're steppin' in.

STEVEN: Eww smirks back

[Trans. End of Racing Site]

(Kevin's sports car arrives ahead of Jenny's car at a car park at the foot of a hill, while various bystanders, including Buck Dewey, Sour Cream and Ronaldo Fryman, watch on.)

JENNY: frustrated Ugh! My practice didn't pay off at all! That was so bad!

(Techno music pulses from Kevin's car as he steps out and leans on the open car door.)

KEVIN: I know, baby. I'm the worst.

(Jenny scoffs.)

KEVIN: Anyone else think they can beat me and my Himitsu X-12 on the downhill course, step right up.

(Ronaldo and some other folks remain silent.)

KEVIN: Come on, how am I going to get a cool-down lap if no one wants to go?

(The sound of engine revving is then heard, as the Dondai drives into the car park. The car door opens and Stevonnie steps out.)

STEVONNIE: I'll race you!

KEVIN: Huh?

RONALDO: Ah! Aah! rushes towards Stevonnie enthusiastically Ha! Is that a '96 Supremo!?

STEVONNIE: Uh... I think it's a Dondai?

RONALDO: A Supremo is a Dondai!

STEVONNIE: Wow. Really?

RONALDO: ...Are you saying you don't know the true power of the Supremo? adjusts his glasses menacingly

STEVONNIE: Uh...

KEVIN: Huh! That's why I knew those brats at the car wash; they're you! Your whole "two kids in a beautiful trench coat" routine won't fool me this time, so don't even try it!

STEVONNIE: You don't know what you're talking about. I'll show you what I'm made of when I beat you at this race! slaps the hood of the Dondai

KEVIN: Heh. I see what's going on here.

STEVONNIE: crosses their arms disdainfully Do you?

KEVIN: You've had a taste of Kevin, and now you're obsessed.

STEVONNIE: pauses, and then squints frustratingly* What? *grits their teeth

KEVIN: shrugs innocently I get it. I have that effect on people. It's cute. But aren't I a little old for you?

STEVONNIE: Gah! Do you want to race or not!?

KEVIN: The start is at the top of the mountain. We go when the clock strikes the hour. First one to the bottom wins, but you don't have to worry about that last part. smirks smugly

STEVONNIE: Ah! blushes and growls angrily

(Kevin gets in his Himitsu and speeds off up the hill, leaving smoke from the tires skidding and causing everyone, except Stevonnie, to cough.)

STEVONNIE: That guy is going down.

[Trans. Start of Racing Site, Twilight]

(Both the Himitsu and the Dondai, with the engines on, are parked side by side on the road at the top of the hill, as crickets are heard chirping in the background. Kevin checks at his analog watch, displaying a few minutes till 9 o'clock. He then glances at Stevonnie, who is growling in frustration.)

KEVIN: smirks tauntingly You know, this mountain pass has some really beautiful views. Shame you'll only be seeing my tail lights the whole time.

STEVONNIE: grips the steering wheel agitatedly You wish.

(Stevonnie glances at the electrical clock in the Dondai, as the time turns "8:59". Electric mid-tempo music begins playing in the background as road lights switch on off-screen.)

KEVIN: It's Kevin time!

(Kevin revs his car engine and takes off, scaring a nearby blue jay.)

STEVONNIE: startled Shoot!

(Stevonnie shifts their car gear and takes off as well, while the blue jay perches on a yellow Winding Road danger sign. Kevin speeds ahead down the road alone, as he drives smugly and confidently. Lights then emit from behind him as Stevonnie catches up from behind.)

STEVONNIE: *sweating I won't let you win!

(Stevonnie shifts the gear and speeds past Kevin.)

STEVONNIE: Ha ha! laughing tauntingly, and then spot a sharp turn on a cliff up ahead Oh.

(Back in the car park, Ronaldo is spectating the race with a pair of binoculars.)

RONALDO: Oh my gosh! lowers his binoculars This is it!

JENNY: Are they gonna crash?

RONALDO: No! We're about to witness the true power of the Supremo!

THE COOL KIDS & A BYSTANDER: ... Oh...!

(In their panic, Stevonnie quickly drops the gear, pulls the hand brake and slams their foot on the brake pedal. They yanks the steering wheel left, closing their eyes tightly, as the Dondai begins drifting through the sharp turn. Stevonnie then open their eyes, realizing they have drifted successfully.)

STEVONNIE: chuckles smugly Huh?

(Stevonnie then notices that Kevin has already caught up to their car.)

KEVIN: So you do know how to use that thing. laughs tauntingly

(Kevin changes his car gear using paddle shifters and speed ahead, drifting through another sharp turn, when Stevonnie still right behind him. Kevin then suddenly slows down his car, causing Stevonnie to slow down as well to avoid colliding in him, and speeds off after faking them out. The two cars eventually begin drifting side by side at another sharp turn.)

KEVIN: smugly I know you want to be close, but this is a little clingy.

STEVONNIE: sticks their tongue out in disgust Ugh.

(The two cars continue racing along a straight road side by side, with the Dondai still falling slightly behind.)

KEVIN: Feel like giving up yet?

STEVONNIE: Ugh! Why do you have to be such a jerk, all the time?

KEVIN: looks away uncomfortably* The truth is, I don't mean to be this way. I-I just lash out because of my little brother. *inhales sharply and sighs* He's sick. Been sick all our lives. Sometimes I think if I act real cool and never let anyone see my pain, then maybe the pain will go away. And maybe... *covers his face with his hand I can take his pain away, too.

STEVONNIE: Kevin... I had no idea.

(Kevin starts sniffling, seemingly crying, before breaking into a hysterical laughter.)

KEVIN: Dude! I don't even have a brother! I'm like this because I think it's funny!

STEVONNIE: UGGGHHH!

KEVIN: Chowzers. speeds ahead

STEVONNIE: teeth gritting Kevin!

(Stevonnie grips onto the steering wheel as they glares and groans in fury at the Himitsu just in right of them. Their vision then turns narrow as they begin to hallucinate.)

STEVONNIE (CONNIE): What's... happening?

STEVONNIE (STEVEN): Kevin!...

(Stevonnie glances up at the rear view mirror and gasps in shock, as they sees the road crumbling underneath the Dondai behind them.)

STEVONNIE (CONNIE): panicking Ah!

STEVONNIE (STEVEN): No! We have to beat him. He deserves to lose!

(Stevonnie tries to maintain focus on the Himitsu, when a ghastly figure of Kevin's face with red glowing eyes appears and approaches towards them. Stevonnie screams in fright and veers the steering wheel to their left, as everything cuts to black.)

[Time-Skip]

(The Dondai is seen idling in the middle of the road, having skidded out of control and facing the wrong way. Inside the car, Steven and Connie, having unfused from Stevonnie, are sitting shoulder-to-shoulder on the driver seat in bracing positions.)

STEVEN: panting Are you okay?

CONNIE: I think so. Are you okay?

STEVEN: Yeah.

(Steven and Connie sigh in relief and recline in the driver seat.)

STEVEN: Seems like the car is safe, too.

(Connie opens the car door and steps out, looking down the road.)

STEVEN: What are you doing?

CONNIE: turns to Steven What are we doing?

STEVEN: We're getting Kevin back. We're about to beat him at his own game!

CONNIE: Yeah, but why do we even have to play his game?

STEVEN: Because-! He's- he's... DAGH! grunts flustered

CONNIE: I know! So why should he get to have any say over how we feel?

STEVEN: He doesn't!

CONNIE: But, he's the reason we're racing. Steven... He's the reason we fused...

STEVEN: gasps in realization We are obsessed with him.

CONNIE: ... I want to finish this race... but not for him.

STEVEN: takes a deep breath* Right. *walks over to Connie and holds out his hand For us!

(Connie grabs Steven's hand as the two exchange determined looks. Back in the car park, the Cool Kids and bystanders are watching with concerns and worries.)

JENNY: The Supremo isn't moving! Ugh, that's it, I'm gonna go up there and check if they're okay.

RONALDO: Wait!

(Ronaldo points up at the hill as the Dondai's engine revs and its lights lit up again. Stevonnie, fused back together, grins, reverses the car back upright and speeds down the road. They eventually catches up as Kevin spots them in his rear view mirror.)

KEVIN: scoffs Finally.

(The Dondai drives up next to the Himitsu.)

KEVIN: You caught up. I was worried you'd miss seeing me win.

(Stevonnie does not reply or look in Kevin's direction, much to his annoyance.)

KEVIN: What, so you're shy now?

(Stevonnie continues to ignore Kevin and speeds ahead of him.)

KEVIN: surprised What?!

(Kevin grunts and accelerates his car. Both cars drift through another sharp turn, passing by a convex mirror, and speeds through another straight road. Stevonnie then looks out in their car in curiosity.)

STEVONNIE: Woah...

(From the road, Stevonnie is able to see a clear view of Beach City behind Rehoboth Bay, with the full moon shining upon it and making it look milky-white. They then looks up to the sky and sees radiant stars in the clear night sky. They laugh softly with joy, admiring the beautiful scenery. Kevin, falling behind, sneers and growls in frustration as he spots the car park; the finish line coming in view. He then grins smugly and activates a nitrous canister at the back of his car, boosting him past Stevonnie and beating them at the last minute.)

JENNY: disappointed Aww! I was rooting for you, Dondai!

RONALDO: Kevin is the worst! Boo!

KEVIN: taunting Stevonnie What, what? That's right! First place, baby! It's like I invented winning.

STEVONNIE: holds out their hand Good race.

KEVIN: looks at their hand suspiciously You tryin' to... kiss my hand with your hand or something?

STEVONNIE: You know, Kevin, you were right.

KEVIN: scoffs and turns away I know. ...About what?

STEVONNIE: The view from the mountain was pretty great.

KEVIN: gets agitated Hey! don't try to teach me a lesson! You lost!

STEVONNIE: Second place isn't so bad... for my first time driving a car. makes a peace sign and walks back towards the Dondai

KEVIN: scoffs in displeasure Look at you! You're so obsessed with me, you're gonna drive away.

(Stevonnie begins driving off.)

KEVIN: Fine! Go play with some kiddy toy cars! I could beat you at that, too!

(Stevonnie glances at Kevin, yelling in desperation, through their rear view mirror as they continues driving off, smiling to themselves.)

KEVIN: Don't forget! You're obsessed with me! runs onto the road Obsessed! Obseeeeeessed!

(The star iris closes on the Dondai shrinking in distance, ending the episode.)

[END]