Bad Memories

When I was six, I wore a red-and-white dress and the neighbor kids called me Minnie Mouse
But the neighbor kids were the only ones I was allowed to invite to my house
So my friends would be my friends, as long as we were not at school
Where they'd treat me like garbage to make them seem cool
And I'm bitter, I'm still a little bit bitter...

In middle school, my parents thought I should hang out with kids who weren't so male
And then some girls tried to lock me in the bathroom while they watched Monty Python and the Holy Grail
And after ten years, most of me has grown up and moved on
But a little bit still wants them to admit that they were wrong
And that's not helping, that's really not helping

I still hear the voices saying that no one likes me
And sometimes I believe them, even now
I can't forget the taste of that pain and that fear
But I dilute those bad memories with more good ones every year
And I'm bitter, but it is over

I spent my high school years overcompensating for my insecurity and that was lame
I burnt more bridges than a retreating army, and I was lonely, and I had myself to blame
Senior year, my boyfriend told me that my friends
Didn't really like me, it was all pretend...
And that hurt; he was kind of a jerk

I try to live my life without regrets
And I try pretty hard to just forget
'Cause it doesn't help me to think about all my young strife
I know I'm great today because of all of that hell
But I think I could have been a happy kid as well
And still made something positive out of my life

But there's nobody flawless who can cast the first stone
I've got a bucket full of rocks here that are never getting thrown
I still remember the classroom where I made a girl cry
I don't remember how I did it and I don't remember why
But a bully isn't thinking; she's an anger-feelings blur
And like a snake, she's more afraid of you than you could be of her
But that doesn't make it better, that doesn't make it right

I still hear the voices saying that no one likes me
And sometimes I believe them, even now
I can't forget the taste of that pain and that fear
But I dilute those bad memories with more good ones every year
And I'm sorry, and I'm glad it is over