Bad Days

[Intro]
Behind every smile, there’s a story folks don’t tell
Cause even in the brightest days, shadows have their moments
Sometimes those shadows settle deep
In places no one ever notices
But ironic enough, it ain’t the shadows that dim your light
It’s the jealous souls trying to blow out your flame

[Verse 1]
Life is like the weather, hit with the worst nature
Tried to harbor good vibes since a third grader
I was homeschooled, that was one of the first major change of my life
Yeah, let’s peel back the first layer
Growing up, I was bullied a lot
I was a chubby kid who was over the top
They stole my school money, even cut off my locks
They poured food on my head, or wouldn’t throw me the rock
Teachers were involved, skin color was wrong
I was too black to some, or wasn’t enough
But now what?
I got a story to jot
Another story to plot
Cause I got a motherfucking legacy to build
Let me see the thrill, let me keep it real
Best believe I will never sleep until
I rest in peace and I’m deceased, for real
My Achilles heel’s keeping it all sealed
If I’m running out of time, then that time is getting killed cause I don’t like to

[Chorus]
To let it out
Without a shadow of doubt
I had a couple bad days, I told no one about
I’m used to shutting my mouth (And I ain’t the type of dude)
To let it out
Without a shadow of doubt
I had a couple bad days, I told no one about
I’m used to shutting my mouth

[Verse 2]
I used to be open and expressed (About what, Wayne?)
How I felt to my parents and
I even told them I’m depressed (And how did that turn out?)
But it felt too embarrassing
I put emotions to rest (I see)
That’s a skill I inherited (Why? Tell me why)
So I’m hoping for the best (And what’s the best?)
When I think I’m going manic so
It started as a teenager
I didn’t know how to deal with this depression
As I grew I knew I grew a fucking deep anger
Developed porn as a habit for a de-stressor
I had a resentment for my parents, and they told me it was peer pressure
I was praying to the lord above, I kept asking
Why the hell that he put me at a disadvantage
Hell, half my life I’ve known a couple meth addicts
Hell, I lived with them
Hell, related to them
Hell, I’ve sang with them
Hell, been robbed by them
Hell, was threatened by them
Hell, damn near killed by them
Hell, animals murdered too, but shit that’s nothing, right?
I’ve damn near died a couple times
I also tried to take my life
I fucking loved the thought of suicide
Until I saw a dude blow his brains out, and I’m like fuck that idea, ooh

[Chorus]
To let it out
Without a shadow of doubt
I had a couple bad days, I told no one about
I’m used to shutting my mouth (And I ain’t the type of dude)
To let it out
Without a shadow of doubt
I had a couple bad days, I told no one about
I’m used to shutting my mouth
And I ain’t the type of dude

[Verse 3]
Shit, hold up, I ain’t finished yet
If life is a movie, then I make a bitch quiet on the set
You wouldn’t have a brain, even if you gave me head
I ain’t want you in my life, bitch, I want you fucking dead

[Interlude]
You see, my patient here has dealt with abuse a lot in his life
And you simply added on, my dear

[Verse 4]
Yeah, haha
Let’s talk about the times I’ve been used
I’ve been used many times, abused many times
But from your point of you, you think I’m cruising through life?
I isolate myself, all the pain’s internalized
I don’t allow others to see me at my (Lowest, lowest)
My ex got with my fucking friend, I felt worthless
And then, very recently, a friend chose you, a side bitch, it’s insane
Over me, 2 years of friendship down the drain
Then you proceed to say, that I’ve never deal with shit
Have you almost froze to death? Been frostbitten?
Is that being a man, what you wanted from me?
My great grandmother died, that’s not a loss to me?
My dad damn near died, I’m not allowed to cry?
What the fuck am I supposed to do? Just pretend it’s alright?
Almost losing my father made me rethink life
Yeah, you apologized, half-assed like a week later
I ain’t even go into the deep layers
Let’s not forget you still wanted me when you were with your man
Lying ass bitch thought I was gonna be the middle man, nah fuck that

[Outro]
Funny thing about being the sick pup of the litter
Everyone’s quick to step over you
But never to stop and wonder what you’ve been through
They just see the runt, not the fight it took to still be breathing
They just see you as a sick pup