Anyway

I didn’t expect to see you here –
I mean outside, smoking
I’m more of a nicorette girl these days
I’m joking
I mean – I did quit
But who feels like joking now?
I’ll see you your scowl
And raise you a furrowed brow

Anyway
Anyway

Do you remember how we used to read
Rilke, Joyce?
And we barely understood it
But it gave us a voice
Or a language…
I don’t read poetry anymore
But if I did
I’d be reading it tonight for sure
Oh. Oh

I keep thinking about how the timing seems false
How some days seem faster than my fucking pulse
And others go so slow
Like this morning
Feels likе a month ago
Oh. Oh
Oh. Oh

I feel like I’m underwater
I feel likе I’m underwater
I feel like I’m underwater
Anyway
Anyway

There’s this building you pass
On the subway to Queens
It’s on the L or the R or the one that’s green
It’s covered in tags
Bright hieroglyphics
These fifteen-year-olds –
They’re so fucking prolific
I’m commuting
I’m eating my goddamn apple
And they’re secretly painting their Sistine Chapel
But whatever
It’s like they know their odds
If you're gonna die young
You'd better live like gods
Gods
Gods

And me?
I’m not doing anything
I’m not helping or cleaning
I’m not even crying
I’m not doing anything
She’d be so goddamn helpful
Well, fuck her for dying ’cause I
I’m not writing her elegy
Not me
I’m not writing that down
They would scrawl her name on a city wall
But I’m a fucking clown
I’m making jokes
So I don’t drown
I feel like I’m underwater
I feel like I’m underwater
I feel like I’m underwater
I feel like I’m underwater
Like the whole world is underwater
Like I’m screaming out underwater
I feel like I’m underwater these days
Anyways
Anyway

I didn’t expect to see you here
I mean – thanks for coming
I thought you’d oppose the use of religious rites as numbing
I mean – it is dumb
But what if she can hear them pray?
I mean what the fuck do we know?
Who are we to say?
If there was anyway
Anyway