Leanin’ On Bob (The r.m.d. Song)

Leanin' on Bob is such a crutch
I swear I wish I didn't listen to him so much
I know I shouldn't follow him around
But I gotta make it to the next town

I gotta see him do one more show
I haven't heard him sing "Desolation Row."
I guess I better get a job
So I won't have to be leanin' on Bob

When times are hard
When times are tough
Leanin' on Bob makes it a little less rough

I ain't no stalker
I ain't no deadhead
But I hang on every word he's ever said

Well, maybe not Wiggle-Wiggle
But then don't you think he's just having a giggle?
If I could just only use words like him
I would need to touch his garment hem

Bob if I had something better to do
I wouldn't make such a big deal of you

When I was young I wanted to be
Bob so bad it turned my hair curly
I'm not too wild about "Slow Train Coming"
Still, leanin' on Bob is a holy thing

I swear I see his head when he sings
"I Dreamed I Saw St. Augustine."
Come on Bob, I'm countin' on you
I can quit smoking if you do too

Aw, rent ears, I'm talking to you
Yeah I can holler Judas too
Even though it'd only be funny for me
I could never mean it literally

Leanin' on Bob is so much fun to do
I count myself among your number two
I long ago concluded
I wasn't so deluded to think I was one percent; ask Bob
Bodukan is a hard sell, so is Cat's In The Well
But still I'm gonna lean on Bob

If I could just get inside his sweatshirt hood
I know Bob and I could do each other good

Leanin' on Bob is kind of lame
But you'll never convince me I should be ashamed

Leanin' on Bob is such a crutch
Swear I wish I didn't listen to him so much
I know I shouldn't follow him around
I gotta make it to the very next town
I haven't heard him sing "If You Gotta Go, Go Now."