Your Husband’s Cheating On Us

She said, honey, you don't know me
But I know you
Do you mind if I come in
It'll only take a minute or two

And by the way I really like
What you've done to this place
It doesn't really surprise me
'Cause we kind of have the same taste

But that's enough small talk
There's something that we need to discuss
Your husband's cheating on us

She said, you look surprised
Well, I'm surprised that you never knew
I can't believe you didn't pick up
On my rather strong perfume
(It was Giorgio)

But anyway, we've been replaced
And she's much younger than me and you
And she's out there with him now
Doing all the things that we used to do

So why don't we get together
You know, we could be dangerous
'Cause your husband's cheating on us

Ah, ah, ah, ah, snakes are in the kitchen
Crows are on the line
Ah, ah, ah, ah, the weather vane is twitching
Can't you see the sign, sign, s-s-sign

This is where I start to cry
And she said, honey, you'll get over it
Just never mind my fantasies
Of cyanide or taking out a hit

On second thought it's better, don't you think
To make him wish that he was dead
So promise me you'll take that creep
For everything he's ever had instead

I've got a Polaroid camera
And a room number at the Hotel Nautilus
Where your husband's cheating on us
He's cheating on us