You Can’t Do Me

You can't do me, you can't do me, you can't do me the way you did before
You can't do me, you can't do me, you can't do me the way you did before
'Cause when you do, and when you do, 'cause when you do, you know I get so blue
When you do, and when you do, 'cause when you do, you know I get so blue and I go
Down like a deep sea diver, out like a Coltrane tenor-man
Lost like a Chinese war baby gone, gone, gone
Blewed like a Mississippi sharecropper, screwed like a high-school cheerleader
Tattooed like a popeyed sailorman, gone, gone, gone

I should have been, I should have been, I should have been a pair of ragged claws
I should have been, I should have been, I should have been a pair of ragged claws
And for a while, for just a while, for a good long while you'd see me smile, smile, smile
I'd crawl the seas on my bony knees, no apologies for my brave new style, I wouldn't go
Bust like an internet millionaire, boom like a Lebanese belly-dancer
Bang like a new year's firecracker, gone, gone, gone, I wouldn't get
Bent like a rattan rockin' chair, blanked like a last place also ran
Burned like an Arkansas griddlecake, gone, gone, gone

I should have been, I should have been, I should have been a pair of ragged claws.
And if I was, if I was, if I was then I'd complain no more
And for a while, for just a while, for a good long while you'd see me smile, smile, smile
I'd crawl the seas, on my bony knees, no apologies for my brave new style
I wouldn't get

Wrecked like a rebel on a racetrack, jacked like a '51 Cadillac
Macked like a bunny in a mansion, gone, gone, gone
Spitooned like an Alabama 'backy wad, harpooned in a Melville sailor yard
Cartooned like a Charlie Brown Christmas card, gone, gone, gone

Schooled like a milk money bully whip, sued like a teenage downloader
Unglued like a bull in a china shop, gone, gone, gone
Cranked like a speed freak high-roller, yanked like a little league ball swatter
Spanked like a fly on a bar counter, gone, gone, gone

Duked like a pistol whipped card swapper, rebuked like a Bible Belt border crosser
Juked like a payola chart topper, gone, gone, gone!