With desired wings (the zero greater than the one / burnt-antlers)

(This is the part of my body where divinity touched me
A rough approximation of where and how it was felt
And why it felt that way and who felt it and for how long)

A ten-thousand-eyed-something-staring-you-down
A gaze that sears and boils the skin
For just an instant and then it looks elsewhere
Uncountable sets of jaws snapping shut on your phalanges
Before lifting to show you unscathed
A hand that teases and does not provide orgasm
It arouses you, which disgusts you
Which arouses you
Because you're no stranger to denial
To be tied up for centuriеs
All along knowing that you'll be set free tomorrow

We stеpped away from love, pages at a time
Until flames consumed the library
We emerged, soot-soaked, with nothing left to need
Sat and prayed for the safe passage of what we'll never read

No way to know how many
Nobody counting, no need for it now
Fully aware of what the other hands are doing
I watch them all let go at once
Trust, and follow suit

Twenty-seven saltires I've found my self affixed to
Nineteen explanations for what was done to my soul
Nine attempts to get even
None successful

I do not lose control anymore
I only give it away