Who Am I?

Lay down, she said
Why don't you just get a grip?
You're shutting down again
Reclusive bends

Weight like lead
All your thoughts undone
You become a loaded gun
Illusions can't give in
Are all those voices winning?

All my life
Has been a lie
Who am I?

Lay down, she said
You're always playing dead
Struggling between
All the chaos
Constant whispering
Can't get clear
The better of my fear
At times you just pretend
But you've lost it again

They all talk at once
But no one's there
Raise your voice
Cold blank stare
Confusion in life
Tell him it's all right
It hurts you
You take
You smile
You're faking it
Once again pretend
But it's all lost again

How will I survive this time
Lay down, she said
You're always playing dead
How can you survive
Because this just isn't right
I'm losing it again