Two Weeks Notice

Co-worker talk: 
Yes, yes… just another day at the office. 
Hey Steven, how are ya? 
Did you watch the golf game last night? It’s pretty incredible!
Steve, Steve… look at Lisa’s ass. That is the perfect peach! It is amazing!
Hey, new guy. Are you looking at what I’m looking at? Yes, right there

Verse one:
Welcome to my new corporate gig, it’s been a minute since I’ve worked
but they was offering shiiiit… fly benefits and perks
compared to my last job, I could’ve invented the earth
and they still would’ve underpaid or diminished my worth
Now my rate of pay’s doubled, my vacation days tripled
Health insurance ain’t the cost of an enderly aged cripple
Even saw some black executives pushing some high speed Porsches
I got a 150 square feet office
No Steve Jobs shit but humbled by it regardless
A year from now my finances won’t be see-sawing
I’ll see more ends, my money’s pointed one way
That’s upwards, before I was like “fuck a 401k”
Cause this the gig that you pray on your knees for
Got a call back from Human Resource and quit my last job
With no remorse, we divorced, my attitude’s the coldest
I got a real job now, fuck your two weeks notice, nigga

Chorus:
Got my mind made up, already got my bags packed
Got some paper saved up, I’m leaving and that’s that
Got no future plans of bringing my ass back
that means I’m giving you my two weeks notice
Got my mind made up, already got my bags packed
Got some paper saved up, I’m leaving and that’s that
Got no future plans of bringing my ass back
that means I’m giving you my two weeks notice

Let’s fast forward about 3 years later
I guess I was blinded by the steady paychecks and whatnot
But I’mma be real with you though. I hate this fucking job, yo!

Verse two:
The distorted truth and corporate loops I must maneuver through
It’s lose-lose if my future’s glued to this cubicle
It’s borderline delusional, a 9 to 5’s a risky route
who chews you up and spits you out the day you have no future use
Banks are less giving, I thought this business was mutual
I’ve been reached my debt ceiling plus my bills through the roof
The daily drive to work feels like commuting to a funeral
the job’s screaming labor costs and not the ones that you induce
I blew a fuse, mad as fuck when I saw my tax deductions
On my last check, man these $#$%@# racking up
I feel like acting up, waving a tech and shooting off a face
Or maybe bash a printer like a scene from Office Space
These yuppy fuckers uppity with no apologies
Thinking the world revolves around their job and their college degrees
You went to Harvard, you graduated from Princeton
I grew up on the other side, your lifestyle was fenced in
Since then I went from the projects to better architecture
Only problem you faced was a Harvard hard semester
I had a father arrested, my cousin caught a charge for possession
You asked for a Jag, your daddy bought a Lexus
You felt like God was testing you, don’t understand it see
I’m like an architect trying to build a bridge to sanity
My sanity’s where? I’m standing empty-handed and bare
I’m feeling like a malt liquor add in Vanity Fair
So out of place just trying to fit in for dividends
Friends say that I’m moving up but it feels like I’m giving in
“Now Kam, I know you put in for that new position
But we just don’t think you’re there yet… sorry”
accepting your place in life is bitter, it’s hard to swallow it
These pride and heart demolishers too much for cardiologists
This job’s stunting my growth, mentally feeling destitute
If life’s full circle, mine appears to be a crescent moon
Sick of this fucking place, meetings and boring lectures
Corny Poindexters, wanna be horny porn extras
Dry ass bagels and coffee, 6 in the morn breakfast
I’m cleaning out my desk today’s the day I’m gone exit

Chorus:
Got my mind made up, already got my bags packed
Got some paper saved up, I’m leaving and that’s that
Got no future plans of bringing my ass back
that means I’m giving you my two weeks notice
Got my mind made up, already got my bags packed
Got some paper saved up, I’m leaving and that’s that
Got no future plans of bringing my ass back
that means I’m giving you my two weeks notice

(This is my job, I keep my shirt tucked in)