Twilight Sparkle vs. Alucard

[Verse 1: Twilight Sparkle & Fluttershy ]
...Am I fighting a red leprechaun? I really must inquire
‘Cause I’ve never read a book that includes mall goth vampires
So I torrented your show and stuck it out until the endin’
And I gotta say it’s not even CLOSE to Rupony Kenshin!
It’s like I caught the disco fever how these moves will have you lose
You took down the Catholics; But you couldn’t touch Lord Smooze!
I’m a magic pony princess, you’re just gross and uncanny
Like, have you seen his Level 1? Talk about eye candy!
I’m guessing your HR Department’s pretty underfunded
With how this serial sex pest gets a third of all the budget
I was thinking of inviting you, you’d certainly be best dressed
But I’d guess you’d misunderstand the point of Molestfest

[Verse 2: Alucard]
Oh hell the fuck no, I have to fight a pony?
I’d rather watch Adventure Time on a TV ma-
...Or perhaps I’ll burn this freak in hellfire
So watch and learn, Twilight! I’m a real fucking vampire!
I’ve got the drip, clip, and sip. We’re not equals
I’ll slash your fics, sink your ships harder than Rip van Winkle’s
Your friends and mentor all think you’re a creepy weeby loner
The most attention you’ll ever get’s from my why boner!
By the way, you can check out my YouTube channel on which
I have an hour long video essay about how you’re a bitch!
You call your friend a [BUY SOME APPLES] and yet I’m the one who’s harmful?
Maybe you should go and CH-CH-CHECK YOUR PRIVILEGE TWILIGHT SPARKLE!

[Verse 3: Twilight Sparkle & Applejack]
This ain’t a war that you’ll win, you crashed and burned like the moon
While I drop bombs like: Hey, it’s Twilight Sparkle’s balloon!
Even Zecora rhymes better, this batty basketcase can bite me!
Hey Alucard! Watch how long I can keep up a rhyme scheme!
You’re Hellsing’s worst agent, your brain is blatantly vacant
Integra’s craving to toss you down in the basement like Cadance
Salacious vagrant who’s brazenly hating all in the nation
And...bacon...pavement……………Behh behh!!!!
Full of yourself like Rainbow, and like her I’m guessing you can’t see
‘Cause those glasses that you’re sporting? Talk about eye candy!
I call upon Celestia through Gaia, use your power!
Give this edgelord punishment of therapy for thirty hours!

[Verse 4: Alucard]
I’m just wishing your pink friend was here. Then I could get some action
That bitch can party hardy and she fucking LOVES cannons
...Where was I? Oh right! You fucking drag
Keep on yapping and I’ll leave both of your torsos in a bag!
My fire’s spreading like a mofo, you done goofed in this debacle
From the moe world to Kimi, you’re forever the worst Sparkle!
And now your production’s halted by some cease and desists
You should change your name to Twilight...McDoesn’tExist!
Forced your brother to marry you after locking up the princess
But hey, I don’t kinkshame. Do what you want, I in-cest
This royal pussy’s fucked! Even if I blew her brains out
Her death would be unnoticed and forgotten, just like Raincloud’s!