Trinity Ruins Christmas

[Verse 1]
It's snowing out and ya'll filled with glee
It's 10 below and I hope ya freeze
Don't gimme that holiday gaudiness please
Those lights and glitter make me sneeze
Now listen up and take my advice
Stole Santa's list and I checked it twice
Ya'll goodie two shoes gonna pay the price
Now lemme tell ya what happens when ya nice

[Pre-Chorus]
I'll take ya presents
I'll snatch ya ham
I'll eat ya cookies
And take ya man
I'll clog ya chimney
I'll steal ya tree
I'm vicious
Don't mess with me

[Chorus]
She's a mean one
She's a bitch
You can call her the Christmas witch
She's a grinch in
Big ol heels
She's a scrooge with sex appeal

[Verse 2]
Nina dressed like a big elf so scary
I make Sharon look like a sugar plum fairy
Someone put Shangela back in her box
Eat Alyssa's back rolls with cranberry sauce
If you think it's only Christmas that makes me rude
Listen, Hanukkah makes me wanna vomit too
I hate Kwanzaa and Boxing day I wanna fight you
Lemme call up Krampus he can be my boo

[Pre-Chorus]
I'll take ya presents
I'll snatch ya ham
I'll eat ya cookies
And take ya man
I'll clog ya chimney
I'll steal ya tree
I'm vicious
Don't mess with me

[Chorus]
She's a mean one
She's a bitch
You can call her the Christmas witch
She's a grinch in
Big ol heels
She's a scrooge with sex appeal

[Verse 3]
I don't want a wreath
I don't want a tree
I'll choke you out with string lights
So let me be
Don't tell me to smile
Don't wanna be jolly
Come on over and I'll show you where to stick ya holly
Can't stand the do-gooders asking for coin
Come caroling I'll punch you square in the groin
I don't want glad tidings
I don't need no one's help
You can keep ya stank ass Jingle Bells to ya self

[Bridge]
Oh my god
What am I feeling?!?
This tingling sensation!
Have I finally discovered the true magic of Christmas?!?
Nope!

[Chorus]
She's a mean one (That's right I'm mean)
She's a bitch
You can call her the Christmas witch (But like a pretty witch)
She's a grinch in (I'm totally a monster)
Big ol heels
She's a scrooge with sex appeal (I really do prefer Halloween)

[Outro]
Um.. where are my milk and cookies?
Actually I'm lactose so do you have any like Silk or something?
Ugh I hate Christmas
Happy holidays or whatever!