Tibetan Jam

[Dave Storrs]
Attention!
Attention!

We have just taken over all airwaves

Do not attempt to change the channel, for we have occupied all frequencies

We, the possessors of the ancient Tibetan theory, holds you all as hopeless prisoners for our experiments, ha ha ha ha!

[Ice-T]
We, who control the bass
We, who control the treble
We can change the soundwaves from piercing highs to thundering lows
For the next few minutes, your mind, body and soul will be unavoidably infiltrated by the almighty supernatural powers of the Tibetan Jam

At this very moment, our special molecular heatwaves are being transferred into your body by means of the dance floor and the speakers
As your body temperature rises, you will notice and begin to pulsing [?] with the beat of the music: a normal reaction
At this time, males and females should by all means not refrain from moving closer, closer! closer!
To the speakers, to receive the total energy of the Tibetan Jam

[Dave Storrs]
As the music takes you into a seemingly trance-like state of mind
It is highly recommended that you cooperate with the feeling to move and dance
Many have attempted to fight the rhythmic powers of the Tibetan Jam by standing absolutely still
Not recommended

"I will not dance"
"I don't wanna dance"
"Well, maybe I'll dance a little"
"I'm dancing"
"I'm dancing!"
"I can't stop my feet!"
"Aaaaahh!"

This maneuver is not safe, for it will cause a definite overload of Tibetan heatwaves
Lack of motion could prove fatal

Dance!
Dance, you fool!
Dance!
Faster!
Faster!

We now return to you control of the airwaves
We, possessors of the Tibetan theory, believe:
All that are can jam
All that is can move
So we are personally searching for subjects who do not respond to the music
So that we can bring them to our laboratories and use them as disco lab specimens so that we can run many more elaborate tests and experiments, ha ha ha!
Our agents are among you, beware!
But this could never happen to you, 'cause you're dancing, right?
Ha ha ha ha ha!