The New Inn. Act 4. Scene 2.

Tipto, Burst, Huffle, Fly.

Come, let us take in fresco, here, one Quart.
Bar. Two Quarts, my Man of War, let us not be stinted.
Huf. Advance threeJordans, Varlet o' the House.
Tip. I do not like your Burst Bird; He is sawcy:
Some Shop-keeper he was?
Fly. Yes, Sir.     Tip. I knew it,

A broke-wing'd Shop-keeper? I nose 'em streight.
He had no father, I warrant him, that durst own him;
Some Foundling in a Stall, or the Church-porch;
Brought up i' the Hospital; and so bound Prentice;
Then Master of a Shop; then one o' th' Inquest;
Then breaks out Bankrupt, or starts Alderman:
The Original of both is a Church-porch --
Fly. Of some, my Colonel.
Tip. Good Faith, of most!
O' your Shop-Citizens, th' are rude animals!
And let 'em get but ten mile out a Town,
Th' out swagger all the Wapen-take.
Fly. What's that?
Tip. A Saxon word to signifie the Hundred.
Bar. Come let us drink, Sir Glorious, some brave Health
Upon our tip-toes.     Tip. To the Health o' the Bursts.
Bur. Why Bursts?     Tip. Why Tipto's?
Bur. O' I cry you mercy!
Tip. It is sufficient.
Huf. What is so sufficient?
Tip. To drink to you is sufficient.
Huf. On what terms?
Tip. That you shall give Security to pledge me.
Huf. So you will name no Spaniard, I will pledge you.
Tip. I rather chuse to thirst; and will thurst ever,
Than leave that Cream of Nations un-cry'd up.
Perish all Wine, and gust of Wine.
Huf. How! spill it?
Spill it at me?     Tip. I wreck not, but I spilt it.
Fly. Nay, pray you be quiet, Noble Bloods.
Bur. No Spaniards,
I cry, with my Cozen Huffle.
Huf. Spaniards? Pilchers?
Tip. Do not provoke my patient Blade. It sleeps,
And would not hear thee: Huffle, thou art rude,
And dost not know the Spanish composition.
Bur. What is the Recipe? Name the Ingredients.
Tip. Valour.     Bur. Two Ounces!
Tip. Prudence.     Bur. Half a Dram!
Tip. Justice.     Bur. A Penny weight!
Tip. Religion.     Bur. Three Scruples!
Tip. And of Gravidad.     Bur. A Face-full!
Tip. He carries such a Dose of it in his Looks,
Actions, and Gestures, as it breeds Respect
To him from Savages, and Reputation
With all the Sons of Men.
Bur. Will it give him Credit
With Gamesters, Courtiers, Citizens, or Tradesmen?
Tip. He'll borrow Money on the stroke of his Beard!
Or turn off his Mustaccio! His meer Cuello,
Or Ruff about his Neck, is a Bill of Exchange
In any Bank in Europe! Not a Merchant
That sees his Gate, but straight will furnish him
Upon his Pase!
Huf. I have heard the Spanish Name
Is terrible, to Children, in some Countries;
And us'd to make them eat their Bread and Butter,
Or take their Worm-seed.
Tip. Huffle, you do shuffle:

-- To them, Stuffle, Pinnacia.

Bur. 'Slid here's a Lady!
Huf. And a Lady gay!
Tip. A well-trimm'd Lady!
Huf. Let's lay her aboard.
Bur. Let's hail her first.
Tip. By your sweet favour, Lady.
Stu. Good Gentlemen be civil, we are Strangers.
Bur. And you were Flemings, Sir!
Huf. Or Spaniards!
Tip. They are here, have been at Sevil i' their days,
And at Madrid too!     Pin. He is a foolish Fellow,
I pray you mind him not, he is my Protection.
Tip. In your protection he is safe, sweet Lady.
So shall you be in mine.
Huf. A share, good Coronel.
Tip. Of what?
Huf. Of your fine Lady! I am Hodge,
My Name is Huffle.
Tip. Huffling Hodge, be quiet.
Bur. And I pray you, be you so, Glorious Coronel
Hodge Huffle shall be quiet.
Huf. A Lady, gay, gay:
For she is a Lady gay, gay, gay. For she's a Lady gay.
Tip. Bird o' the Vespers, Vespertilio, Burst;
You are a Gentleman o' the first Head.
But that Head may be broke, as all the Body is --
Burst, if you tie not up your huffle quickly.
Huf. Tie Dogs, nor Man.
Bur. Nay, pray thee, Hodge, be still.
Tip. This Steel here rides not on this Thigh in vain.
Huf. Shews'st thou thy Steel and Thigh, thou glorious Dirt?
Then Hodge sings Sampson, and no ties shall hold.

-- Pierce, Jug, Jorden.     [to them.

Peir. Keep the Peace, Gentlemen: what do you mean?
Tip. I will not discompose my self for Huffle.
Pin. You see what your Entreaty and Pressure still
Of Gentlemen, to be civil, doth bring on?
A Quarrel? and perhaps Man-slaughter? You
Will carry your Goose about you still? your Planing-Iron?
Your Tongue to smooth all! is not here fine stuff?
Stu. Why Wife?
Pin. Your Wife? Ha' not I forbidden you that?
Do you think I'll call you Husband i' this Gown,
Or any thing in that Jacket, but Protection?
Here tie my Shooe, and shew my Velvet Petticoat,
And my Silk Stocking! why do you make me a Lady,
If I may not do like a Lady, in fine Cloathes.
Stu. Sweet Heart, you may do what you will with me.
Pin. I knew that at home; what to do with you;
But why was I brought hither? to see Fashions?
Stu. And wear them too, Sweet Heart, but this wild.
Company --
Pin. Why do you bring me in wild Company?
You'd ha' me tame, and civil, in wild Company?
I hope I know, wild Company are fine Company,
And in fine Company, where I am fine my self,
A Lady may do any thing, deny nothing
To a fine Party, I have Heard you say't.

-- To them Peirce.

Peir. There are a Company of Ladies above
Desire your Ladiships Company, and to take
The Surety of their Lodgings from the affront
Of these half beasts, were here e'en now, the Centaures.
Pin. Are they fine Ladies?
Peir. Some very fine Ladies.
Pin. As fine as I?
Peir. I dare use no Comparisons,
Being a Servant, sent --
Pin. Spoke, like a fine Fellow!
I would thou wert one; I'd not then deny thee:
But, thank my Lady.

-- To them Host.

Hos. Madam, I must crave you
To afford a Lady a Visit, would excuse
Some Harnshness o' the House, you have receiv'd
From the brute Ghests.

Pin. This's a fine Old Man!
I'ld go with him an' he were a little finer!
Stu. You may, Sweet Heart, it is mine Host.
Pin. Mine Host!
Host. Yes, Madam, I must bid you welcome.
Pin. Do then.
Stu. But do not stay,
Pin. I'll be adives'd by you; yes!