The Merciless Day

Follow the sun
Meaningless tide
Day by day
To wash me by
Shivering cold
Painted in blue
Lock me indoors
To keep me from you
C'est la vie

Two inseparable entities
Coalesce with a meeting of the eyes
One says nothing and the other merely whispers
Cautiously to avoid catching the victim by surprise
To be in this mess and not know who's to blame
We breeze past each other and end up just the same
But finally you saw me and noticed something wrong
Though I provided the world for you, it failed me all along

And I can see the sun is rising through the blinds
I turn my body over and I request that I decide
But life just dulls you sometimes, and it's been dulling me
I tie my hands behind my back and promise you you'll see

Two inseparable entities
Find today a meeting of the minds
To complicate things, one of them is holding
A secret weapon that is loaded full of lies
I may have meant to work to clear the air
But never having heard from you I assumed that all is fair
And now you seek to break my silent apprehension
So nothing now that you should know will come to your attention

And I can see the sun is rising through the blinds
I turn my body over and I request that I decide
But life just dulls you sometimes, and it's been dulling me
I tie my hands behind my back and promise you you'll see

There are many words now
That I wish I could say
But I have made up my mind
And it's happening on this day

I swear to god if you only knew
What this whole fucking thing has put me through
For this entire year that I have spent in silence
Hoping for someone else to ask
Well now that you're listening and I've got your ear
Let me tell you how I've been doing here
If this is any indication
You can probably guess it's not fucking well

And all your situations
Only seem to dig me deeper in
I miss having conversations
That I left happily in the end
Or to trudge along in weakness
And be greeted at the end
With a celebratory sweetness
And a good old friend

What's my purpose here?
I'm wasting my time
Don't need any more
You didn't ask I'm fine
To think those words would fuck me up like this
I can break the mold, but I cannot resist

To end up a hollow shell
To end up out-of-touch with it
To end up indebted

Spiraling I release
This final part of me
That was kept somehow bound
Somehow safe, somehow sound
Now it fails to be held
And it breaks from its shell
Way back when I was young
Position I started from
Doomed to fail and right now
The prophecy is sorted out
All alone but with your help
Now I lose my sense of self

And I know this is it
This is what we have built
Foundation that started off
Looking good now has lost
All it could ever give
I just ask you forgive
But if that takes too much
Believe me I know it does
I have tried to recall
Feeling that started all
And it gave nothing back
Nothing but hopeless black

I've wasted three whole years
Playing pretend to hold on
And what has kept me going is
To know that someone somewhere
Believes that I can do it
But they don't anymore
You're not the same you were back then
I guess that means we've both changed

Two inseparable entities
Now have found themselves oceans apart
As one turns away, the other reaches back
But there's no answer so the reunion never starts
No conversation could ever make this up
When you and I rekindle, well that would be enough
But we both know the universe just has its other plans
And we have yet to see if this day will ever end

And I can see the sun is rising through the blinds
I turn my body over and I request that I decide
But life just dulls you sometimes, and it's been dulling me
I tie my hands behind my back and promise you you'll see

I don't deserve this
You don't deserve this
And I don't deserve you
I don't deserve you
But I don't deserve this
I don't deserve this
I don't deserve this
I don't deserve this