The Laughing Policeman

I know a fat ole policeman, he's always on our street
A fat and jolly, red-faced man, he really is a treat
He's too kind for a policeman, he's never known to frown
They say he is the happiest man in all of London town

(Laughter)

He laughs upon his duty, he laughs upon his beat
He laughs at everybody when he's walking down the street
He never can stop laughing, he's never even tried
But once he did arrest a man and laughed until he cried

(Laughtеr)

His jolly face, it wrinkled, and then hе shut his eyes
He opened up his great big mouth, it was a wondrous size
He said "I must arrest you, but I don't know what for"
And then he started laughing, 'till he almost cracked his jaw

(Laughter)

So if you chance to meet him while walking through the town
Just shake him by his ole fat hand and give him half a crown
His eyes will beam and sparkle, he'll gurgle with delight
And then you'll start him laughing, with all his blessed might

(Laughter)