The Kickstand Song

Up until now my ideas have been latent
The cycling word has never been the same
But come first light I'll be taking out a patent
And from that day
If a bike be found lying on the ground again
I'm not to blame
What joy it'll bring, piece of metal and a spring
Bolted down by the back wheel, activated by the heel
What chicken laid the egg from whence inside an idea hatches
From prototype to production line to the first one hundred batches
I will do for parking bikes what anchors did for sailing
There's handlebars for steering and tyre tread for traction
A tiny bell for friends you pass and greet
But when they add my ingenious contraption
Mouths will fall
And eyebrows will rise and staring eyes will meet, the bike complete
There'll be articles in newspapers and dinners at the town hall
My first cheque's for a thousands pounds
Now that's one spicy meatball
But all the fame and fortune in the world will not compare…
Now bikes around the world will stand alone without their owners
And I can get some cash on the side but that's just a bonus
When underneath their helmuts I will see their smiling faces