The Election of 1800 (2014 Workshop)

[FULL COMPANY]
The election of 1800

[JEFFERSON]
Can we get back to politics?

[MADISON]
Please?

[JEFFERSON]
Yo. Ev’ry action has an equal, opposite reaction
John Adams shat the bed. I love the guy, but he’s in traction
Poor Alexander Hamilton? He is missing in action
So now I’m facing—

[JEFFERSON AND MADISON]
Aaron Burr!

[JEFFERSON]
With his own faction

[MADISON]
He’s very attractive in the North. New Yorkers like his chances

[JEFFERSON]
He’s not very forthcoming on any particular stances

[MADISON]
Ask him a question: it glances off, he obfuscates, he dances

[JEFFERSON]
And they say I’m a Francophile: at least they know I know where France is!

[MADISON]
Thomas that’s the problem, see, they see Burr as a less extreme you

[JEFFERSON]
Ha!

[MADISON]
You need to change course, a key endorsement might redeem you

[JEFFERSON]
Who did you have in mind?

[MADISON]
Don’t laugh

[JEFFERSON]
Who is it?

[MADISON]
You used to work on the same staff

[JEFFERSON]
Whaaaat

[MADISON]
It might be nice, it might be nice
To get Hamilton on your side
It might be nice, it might be nice
To have some pressure indirectly applied

[JEFFERSON]
Just tell him that Burr might win

[MADISON]
He might!

[JEFFERSON]
He'll act out of pride

[MADISON]
He can't help himself

[JEFFERSON AND MADISON]
It might be nice, it might be nice
To have Hamilton on your side

[BURR]
Talk less!

Smile more!

Don’t let ‘em know what you’re against or what you’re for!

Shake hands with him!

Charm her!

It’s eighteen hundred, ladies, tell your husbands: vote for
Burr!

[MALE VOTER]
I don’t like Adams

[FEMALE VOTER]
Well, he’s gonna lose, that’s just defeatist

[ANOTHER MALE VOTER]
And Jefferson—

[TWO MEN]
In love with France!

[ANOTHER FEMALE VOTER]
Yeah, he’s so elitist!

[TWO WOMEN]
I like that Aaron Burr!

[A WOMAN]
I can’t believe we’re here with him!

[A MAN]
He seems approachable…?

[ANOTHER MALE VOTER]
Like you could grab a beer with him!

[ENSEMBLE]
Dear Mr. Hamilton: your fellow Fed’ralists would like to know how you’ll be voting

[HAMILTON]
It’s quiet uptown

[ENSEMBLE]
Dear Mr. Hamilton: John Adams doesn’t stand a chance, so who are you promoting?

[HAMILTON]
It’s quiet uptown

[MEN]
Jefferson or Burr?

We know it’s lose-lose
Jefferson or Burr?

But if you had to choose
[WOMEN]
Jefferson or Burr?
We know it’s lose-lose

Jefferson or Burr?
But if you had to choose

[EVEN MORE VOTERS]
Dear Mr. Hamilton:

John Adams doesn’t stand a chance so who are you promoting?
But if you had to choose

[MEN]
Jefferson or Burr?

We know it’s lose-lose
Jefferson or Burr?

But if you had to choose

[WOMEN]
Jefferson or Burr?
We know it’s lose-lose

Jefferson or Burr?
But if you had to choose

[HAMILTON]
Well, if it isn’t Aaron Burr. Sir!

[BURR]
Alexander!

[HAMILTON]
You’ve created quite a stir, sir!

[BURR]
I’m going door to door!

[HAMILTON]
You’re openly campaigning?

[BURR]
Sure!

[HAMILTON]
That’s new

[BURR]
Honestly, it’s kind of draining

[HAMILTON]
Burr—

[BURR]
Look
To be the president you have to be unprecedented

[HAMILTON]
Okay I guess but take your line of reasoning and extend it
Is there anything you wouldn't do?

[BURR]
No. I’m chasing what I want
And you know what?

[HAMILTON]
What?

[BURR]
I learned that from you

[MADISON]
The votes are in
And I'll be damned

[JEFFERSON]
Well?

[MADISON]
The electoral college is a tie
Now it's up to the Federalist delegates that Hamilton has in his pocket
He could decide this election

[ENSEMBLE]
If you had to choose
If you had to choose

[HAMILTON]
Yo
I probably shouldn't be adding my voice
But the people are facing a difficult choice
And if you were to ask me who I'd prefer
Don't vote Burr
I have never agreed with Jefferson once
We've been fighting on like twenty five different fronts
But when all is said and all is done
Jefferson has beliefs. Burr has none

[ENSEMBLE]
Oooooooooooooh

[MADISON AND JEFFERSON]
Well, I’ll be damned
Well, I’ll be damned

[MADISON]
Hamilton’s on your side

[ENSEMBLE]
Well, I’ll be damned
Well, I’ll be damned

[JEFFERSON]
Well?

[MADISON]
You won in a landslide

[BURR]
Congrats on a race well-run
I did give you a fight

[JEFFERSON]
Uh-huh

[BURR]
I look forward to our partnership

[JEFFERSON]
Our partnership?

[BURR]
As your vice-President

[JEFFERSON]
Ha. Yeah, right
You hear this guy? Man openly campaigns against me, talkin’ bout, “I look forward to our partnership.”

[MADISON]
It is crazy that the man who comes in second gets to be Vice President

[JEFFERSON]
Yeah, you know what? We can change that. You know why?
‘cuz I’m the President