The Darkness

I've let myself drown in anger
I've put myself into perfect isolation
I've spent days accumulating my hatred
And then
I've opened my darkness and let this nightmare begin

December - it's the time when nature dies
And all the colors fade to black and white
I remember my misery in sleepless night
But what was worse - the lack of any fight

First he was just a voice in my head
And all he wanted was to see her dead
He knew that I will blame myself for doing painful things to her
And I'll carry this guilt forevermore

Five months to take over control
I'm going insane, all I want is to end this pain
That day I realised what could be worse than death
To be a silent witness while he's killing your self
Killing your self

Can't cry anymore (words stuck in the throat)
I moan, I implore (no one hears my call)
Cannot kill this twin (angel and devil in me)
I've opened my darkness and let this nightmare begin

I have no control and I can't
Kill myself to stop this torture
Screaming angels beg for mercy
Suffering is my misfortune

Not my eyes and not my thoughts
Not my decisions, not my words
Locked in my body, my black cell
I only want to end this hell