TERMINALLY ONLINE DUDE SIGNS RECORD DEAL

[Intro/Skit 1]
Hey welcome to the studio
Yeah, what's up dude?
Yeah, good to meet you, for real
Um, yeah, come on in, we are running out of time already
The label says we need to make a song today
Okay, so just get in here?
Yeah so, just- just rap about whatever you're thinking about
Uh, whatever I'm thinking about?
Yup, whatever you're thinking about
Uh right now?
Just rap about it right now
Okay, I didn't prepare anything so-
You're a rapper, just rap about- rap about being a rapper
Okay, um

[Chorus]
Shit
I should probably say something a rapper would like, "Bitch, I'm high"
Or, "I always got the stick on me, like I got crucified"
Maybe, "I'm in inside the hellcat and I'm doing 205"
How 'bout, "I don't play around, this shit to me is do or die" (Yeah, yeah)
Do or die (Yeah, yeah)
Do or die (Yeah, yeah)
Do or die (Yeah, yeah)
Do or die (Yeah, yeah)
Do or die (Yeah, yeah)
It's do or die (Yeah, yeah)
It's do or die (Yeah, yeah)
It's do or die (Yeah, yeah)

[Verse 1]
Yeah, yeah
There ain't no weed in me, this shit is you or I
Drink the Kool-Aid if you want, I know that shit is suicide
I should probably say something a rapper would like, "homicide"
Look at all my commas, stacking up to God up in the sky
In the sky, in the sky, in the sky
In the private jet, I fly over Dubai, then go straight to Rome
I just bought a massive 150 million dollar home
I don't pay my taxes so the middle class is shrinking more

[Skit 2]
How's that?
Yo, do you think you could just rap about normal stuff?
Oh, okay
I don't think the- the average music listener wants to think about the middle class shrinking, let's try the next verse
Okay, ri-right now?
Alright, go
Okay

[Verse 2]
When I'm thumbing through my money, it feel like a dictionary
And I got an AK-47, it is big and scary
Bitch, I'll send you straight to Jesus, I feel like a missionary
Choppa turn yo' ass to smithereens, now there ain't shit to bury
I just popped a perc, it got me talking like I'm Joe Biden
I wonder what Hunter Biden's laptop is really hiding
If you talking shit, the situation can get very violent
Did you know that Jim Carrey took a trip to Epstein Island?
I got VVSs on my neck, you know they flawless diamonds (Yeah)
A laser caused the fires that hit the Hawaiian islands (Yeah)
Smokin' sticky, light the blunt up with a burnin' flame (Yeah)
They did 9/11 to get the insurance claim

[Skit 3]
Yo, so I noticed you keep slipping back into rapping about internet conspiracy-bullshit nobody wants to hear about, please just rap about normal stuff
Okay, I can try- I felt like I was
Okay, let's just try this last part

[Chorus]
Yeah
I should probably say something a rapper would like, "Bitch, I'm high"
Or ,"I always got the stick on me, like I got crucified"
Maybe, "I'm in inside the hellcat and I'm doing 205"
How 'bout, "I don't play around, this shit to me is do or die" (Yeah, yeah)
Do or die (Yeah, yeah)
Do or die (Yeah, yeah)
Do or die (Yeah, yeah)
Do or die (Yeah, yeah)
Do or die (Yeah, yeah)
It's do or die (Yeah, yeah)
It's do or die (Yeah, yeah)
It's do or die (Yeah, yeah)

[Skit 4]
How's that?
Yeah, I actually think that uh- that last hook you laid down is usable
Oh, okay
I'm just gonna get rid of these verses here
Uh-
Just like that...
What the fuck- wait, what
And then we'll send it to Drake to replace them
Wait-