Temporary Education

I was an anxious child
Timorous
And so wild
Buried in CRT (and)
Buried in me

Somehow it got locked in
Caught in this awkward skin
Spasms of entropy
Look at me

I can’t stop you now
Nothing ever changes
And I can’t talk you down
Time to call the temper tamper
God damn cortisol
Botching up the system
Where’s my wherewithal?

Darken the hand I hide
Buried inside of my
Jubilant elegies
Look at me

I can’t stop you now
Tiny rearranger
But I won’t disavow
Distance growing in between us
Maybe cat and cow
Alleviate the anguish
But I’m still stuck for now

Each anniversary
Is starting to feel anything but...
Seems like catastrophe
Is where my heart is home
A shot of ecstasy
To kill the pain of simply being...
Each anniversary
A darkness all its own

I can’t stop you now
Living in estrangement
A song of “show me how”
Temporary education
Ghost World caterwaul
Perpetual erasure
An impulse to enthrall

I was an anxious child
Just look at me now