Nat Puff or Left at London has confirmed in an article by Flood magazine that this song is about suicidal ideation. Nat began writing the song in high school pre-transition, specifically the second half of the chorus. She had the ideas for chords and the feelings she wanted to evoke, but didn’t comp...
[Chorus: Left at London]
If I could go outside again
And I could be like any other girl
I'd dress in a face mask
And walk on the beach 'til my feet hurt
If I were twelve years old again
And I had all the money in the world
I'd buy me a pool pass
And drown myself in a t-shirt
[Post-Chorus: Left at London]
Oh, oh, oh, oh-oh-oh, woah-oh!
Needed for the world not to turn no more
Tried it, but the the bridge won't burn
Oh, oh, oh, oh-oh-oh, woah-oh!
Needed for the world not to turn no more
Tried it, but the the bridge won't burn
[Verse: Left at London]
I prayed
Seems as if God and the devil have been fighting over me
I let whoever take over the motions supposedly
I don't remember a lot of the way that it felt before
But I know that it must be better
'Cause
[Bridge: Left at London]
I cry so much more
But at least it feels more like healing
Than it did before
But I still can't shake this feelin' that
[Chorus: Left at London]
If I could go outside again
And I could be like any other girl
I'd dress in a face mask
And walk on the beach 'til my feet hurt
If I were twelve years old again
And I had all the money in the world
I'd buy me a pool pass
And drown myself in a t-shirt
[Post-Chorus: Left at London]
Oh, oh, oh, oh-oh-oh, woah-oh!
Needed for the world not to turn no more
Tried it, but the the bridge won't burn
Oh, oh, oh, oh-oh-oh, woah-oh!
Needed for the world not to turn no more
Tried it, but the the bridge won't burn (Won't burn)
[Outro: Valeria Espinal]
As long as I just keep my breathing steady
And as long as I keep just moving my legs
Things will just eventually be fine
I kept wanting to find dangerous things to climb on or walk on
Or do whatever on, because it was, like
It was a kind of danger that I could feel for myself
Without it being
A danger that was produced by other humans
Just seeing human bodies be extremely resilient
Or human bodies just having all these impulses in the things that they do
To keep themselves safe
There's just so many little things at play
It's just taking care of everything in the background
T-Shirt was written by Left at London.
T-Shirt was produced by Left at London.
Left at London released T-Shirt on Tue Sep 08 2020.