Surprise

Well I was goin' to a party just last week
Walked through the door, seen this cold stone freak
I was starin', thought my eyes was gonna pop through my face
She wore tight stretch pants, no bra, and black lace
Now I was eyein' her and she was clockin' me
Then she came a little closer, said "I'm all that, B"
Then she walked off quick, but kinda moved at her leisure
And then said "Hi baby, what's your pleasure?"
Bust it. We passed a few words, we started to dance
Then she whispered in my ear, "Could I have a chance?"
I felt her body press harder, she was on my ear
Then she grabbed my hands and stuck em on her rear
She said "I want it." You want it? "Yeah, right now."
Let's take a pause for the cause, baby, let's sit down
So she introduced herself as Miss Buffy
We sat upon a sofa to get a little comfy
She stepped out on me how much she wanted my bod
She asked to go back to my place, I agreed with a nod
So we jumped into my ride, I started conversatin'
She was busy with my coat, I said come on baby be patient
A couple minutes later, her hands took a dip
I was [?] hey what is that like, zip
My hands followed her hands, almost threw my top
And then she looked up, I said oh baby why'd you stop?
She said, "Let's save it" as she held my hand
"I have somethin' to tell you?" What? "I used to be a man"
"You used to be a what? A man? You'd better stop kidding
You must be lying, and you better be tripping."
I [?] my face, grabbed this chick by her neck
Ripped off those stretch pants for a first-rate check
Then I looked, surprise, threw her out and she ran
She said she used to be one? This dude still was a man
I just couldn't believe, this world is full of lies
Don't think that I was ready for that kind of surprise

Well I woke up kinda early, half asleep in the morn
Thought to myself, "Hey, my girlfriend's gone
She's on vacation, hey that's neat"
I said "I'm gonna mess around for a whole long week"
I got out the tub, grabbed my shirt to impress
Put on my Levi's with the permanent press
Walked out the house, shut the door, turned the lock
Hopped down the steps, then I ran up the block
I looked around, seen all kinds of chicks
So many different kinds, which one would I pick?
The girl walked up, and so she spoke
I turned around and saw her face, and I almost choked
But at the same time another passed us by
Now this one really caught my eye
So I ran up, and just my luck
She had a baby, and I thought, so what?
So I introduced myself like this
So sly slick Steady ready for some action
She said, "Can you give it to me, one satisfaction?"
I said, "I can please you cause it's you I adore"
What kind of trouble am I headed for?
Am I really gonna cheat on my girl, really?
Then all of a sudden I got this guilty feeling
Psych! Cause she was sexy and I was on her
She said "Where's your house?" I said "Right around the corner"
We got around the block, she almost had a fit
Cause I made her wait outside, I had to tidy up a bit
So she came in, I gave a tour of my place
Let's get a little cozy with the fake fireplace
We made out on the floor, got snug as a bug
With a [?] cooler and a bear-skin rug
Everything was great, man I'm not lying
Til the door crept open and her baby started crying
Somebody came in, yelled surprise, cut the hype
It was my girlfriend, she said "Man, we're gonna fight"
So she grabbed this girl with no hesitation
I said, "Hey baby, I thought you was on vacation"
She said "Well I'm back," and I said "I can see!"
Damn, I knew I shouldn'ta gave her no key
Surprise