Suicide Letter (AKA The Monster)

[Chorus]
The monster, the mo- the monster
All I see is this but I knew
(It’s the realist shit I ever wrote)
The monster, the mo- the monster
All I see is this but I knew

[Verse 1]
Blood on my hands, I’m tryna wash the stains away
Pills in my hands, I’m tryna take the pain away
Thoughts in my head, they got me goin' crazy, man
Actions of myself are slowly breaking down my fam
These valiums I take, they’re meant to get me through the day
I take a handful, but still I’m in the same place
Depression man, it’s got me fucking cryin' tears at night
In my girl's arms, she tells me it’ll be alright
I can't cope man I’m still in the worst state
She found me slashing up with a fucking razor blade
Call it mental help, admit it to the mental ward
She told me “Losing you is something that I can't afford”
I see my sons face and start to break down
Pop a clerical, Michael, please calm down
I’m walking on the edge, I can't slip though
Long kiss goodnight, and then I overdose

[Chorus]
The monster, the mo- the monster
All I see is this but I knew
The monster, the mo- the monster
All I see is this but I knew

[Verse 2]
Have you ever really tried to take your own life?
Have you ever had them crazy thoughts at night?
If I choose to leave, I hurt the people 'round me
I'm hearing voices in my head, "Daddy don't leave"
Michael, slow down, just take a step back
Spazzing out, I see a doctor with a needle packed
Full of drugs feel my body start to shut down
Loose control as my vision starts to fad out
Waking up, look around, where can I be?
Strapped to a bed, doctors all around me
I talk to the sky, like mumma where you be at
Flash backs of my face, I can see that
Memories racing through my head I'm insane
Talking to a doc but I don't feel the same
I'm over life, I gotta show ya
Deep down inside, I'm a monster

[Chorus]
The monster, the mo- the monster
All I see is this but I knew
The monster, the mo- the monster
All I see is this but I knew