Spiral

Yes, I sense the numbing, best intentions crumbling
Tension in my blood is begging me to punish
Anything I love and every dream you covet
Ends up being cut and empathy is summoned
Steadily corruption enters me and sucks the
Energy to thrust my tendencies out of my body
And out of my soul, sending me deeper
Weakened, I’m spiraling out of control, and the higher I go
And it’s everything or nothing, lest I’m feeling something
Penalties will come and hell will be the summit
Just forget the suffocating nature of it
Eventually you’ll crush the threats that seem redundant
Let it be just what it intends to be
And drug myself in attempts to flush it chemically out of my body
And out of my soul, sending me deeper - weakened
I’m spiraling out of control, and the higher I go

On the precipice, next to the end of my senses
Possessed when I’m tempted, obsessed with the ending
I delve in to pen a duet with dissension
Attempting to lessens this sense of descending

Below…and I’m falling down further it seems
And I’m close the bottom, the curvature swings
And the slope is impossible, swerving and steep
As I roll on, I’m hollow and slurring my speech

I begin to unravel, the inner me is battling for the saddle
And willingly - I’m traveling on a path with a cliff that’s deep
And accidents – when they happen – will sympathy exist for me
As if innocence, it existed? Will they weep
If my sins where this cataclysmic, indiscreet
And these incidents add up - witnessed in the streets
Will they wince or just laugh in relief

I need to feel something at some point from someone
Or some kind of substance, for some type of sustenance
Sometimes I suffer in silence
But as soon as swells, then I set off the sounds of my sirens

On the precipice, next to the end of my senses
Possessed when I’m tempted, Obsessed with the ending
I delve in to pen a duet with dissension
Attempting to lessen this sense of descending

On the precipice, next to the end of my senses
Possessed when I’m tempted, Obsessed with the ending
I delve in to pen a duet with dissension
Attempting to lessen this sense of depression

On the precipice, next to the end of my senses
Possessed when I’m tempted, Obsessed with the ending
I delve in to pen a duet with dissension
Attempting to lessen this sense of descending

Both hands open, I tumble
Coldly embracing the fall
Here you are again, good to see you
Don't think I've missed you at all

Hold tight
Here it goes
Oh right
There is nothing
For you
To hold on
It's your turn now, so

Round and round I go
Spinning downward on the spiral ledge
Moving faster today
Than I did yesterday
When I thought I was closer to the end

Round and round I go
Spinning downward on the spiral ledge
Looping in circles, No proof of this vertigo
Truth is – it’s all in my head

Truth is – it’s all in my head
Truth is – it’s all in my head
Truth is – it’s all in my head
Truth is – it’s all in my head

Don't pick me up
Just let me drown
Don't pick me up
Just let me drown

Just close your eyes
And turn around
Pull back your hand
Don't pull me up
Just close your eyes

If you could feel the things I feel
Then you would know
Just what it is
To fall down
So far below
The darkest smoke
A blackened view

Where there's no wrong
And there's no right
And there's no rules
And there's no start
And there's no you
And there's no me
No recollection
Who I used to be

One day I'll know
Just how it feels
To wear those clothes
To be myself
One day I'll know
To forge the steel
To be the one
To save myself
From myself

This shining knight
A pale white horse
And off he rides

Till I feel something
I haven't felt
Since I was born
Since I was born
Since I was born

The spiral works both ways
The lines will curve and tighten
You’ll find you’ll know the way
You won’t be hurt or frightened

A life that learns no pain
Will never yearn to heighten
So fight the cold and strain
Rewind to where the light is