Spanking Noobs (MGK - Breaking News Parody)

(Intro)
The parody has begun
Ladies and gentlemen
Machine. Gun. Kelly
This kid. I think he is by far
One of the best Pokemon Trainers I have ever seen
He's even got
A level 100 Zubat

(Verse 1)
Knapsack, got that!
And you know I got a Pokemon hat
And you know I got some Pokemon tats
Tatted with a Goldeen and a Machamp
Tatted with a Cubone and Dewgong
And an Oddish, Nidorino, with a Gyarados
And Articuno, got Kabuto
And you know I had to get an Aerodactyl
And a Hypno
And I really want to thank all the Nintendo crew
Because they published all the games that are extra cool
Because I play em every day but mainly Red and Blue
Because I'm never gonna be able to catch a Mew
Because I'm copping all these Pokemon like Exeggcute
Because I'm always running into stupid Tentacool
Because whenever I battle, I get the best of noobs
They try to phase me, doesn't matter, cause I never lose
Thought you had a chance till I sent my Mewtwo out
Yep I got him and a bunch of Zubat
Check out my PC and you'll see look at my stash
Oh snap!
Got Jynx, Lapras, Koffing, Sandslash
Got Pidgey, Snorlax, got Gloom, Golbat
My storage system filled up, oh crap
Guess I should just release a Pokemon that's useless
(Long Pause)
Oh yeah? You don't wanna fight next
Just take a look into my Pokedex
And you'll see Victreebel and Farfetch'd
And you know I got a Parasect
What you say boy? You train boy?
You don't wanna see my Game Boy
Trynna face me's insane boy
I've been spanking noobs since third grade boy
Man you heard about me, you tried to play
You saw my Vileplume and clicked the A
You tried to quit cause you couldn't hit
And I know you hate this cause you can't escape
So you attacked me, I watched ya miss
With your Clefairy, should of taught it swift
Then your guard drops and I shoot ya with
Fire spin, cause I brought Vulpix
Game Boy, I flaunt it
Game Boy, you want it
Take a look, my Game Boy's blue and gold
With the rare Togepi all on it
And you'll see Jigglypuff on the front
And a Pikachu around the corner
Trynna play Weedle against my Onix?
That's just horrid and unfortunate
Man I warned ya that I can play
I told ya you'll have no luck
Hundred games in my hands ache
And you still ain't seen my Golduck
Tried Omanyte against my Venusaur
Cause you swore
That water beats grass
None of these noobies got the handbook
Tell em that they should read that
A-A-ASAP
I have the hardest time when I decide which
One of these Pokemon's my sidekick
Wassup?
My Dragonite is really violent like tyrants
Primape throws em on the ground with seismic
Might just have to go with what my favorite type is
Pick a Haunter or Kadabra cause i like psychic
Guys flinch every time my Pinsir vice grips
I just really wanna win this fight quick
Scyther's looking like he's in a crisis
If he ends up dead, I'll revive him
Got it?
I pick whoever will help me win it
So it's good I got a big collection
Got a Diglett who likes to mimic
And finish off all of my opposition
And an Alakazam that body slams all you nitwits!