Soldering the Line

(Verse)
Lost in my thoughts, while walking under cloudy skies
Every step I take is this closer to the bottom line
Feel I need directions, yet, it's only dollar signs
That provide me guidance, so I guess that's my solace, right?
If I'm motivated by formal reactions
To my wife, kids, dog, house, or boat at my cabin
Then my lifestyle, interests, wisdom, and passion
Are just gone in the shadows, so where the fuck is the magic?
I'm comparing to my friends, maybe that's the mistake
I feel my heart sink a bit when their status updates
I've got another side of me I have to debate
Because I panic and shake when I read "This planet is great!"
Don't believe in destiny, believe in creating it
Sitting at my desk, venting was the stage for it
The transition from A to B, for me, was seemingless
I wouldn't trade a mountain, the sky, or the sea for this
So then the question becomes
Am I home - feeling steady, or am I ready to run?
Or am I petty cause I'm envious of worldly fun?
What's not enough for many, is more than plenty for some
So it feels like I'm playing on a balancing act
Between imagination, and what is valid in fact
Between the bigger picture, and diminishing plans
Between the real me, and who I think that I am
I'm basically caught in a clashing dichotomy
The daily side of me treats life like an odyssey
Yet, the musical part views life so awfully
What I'm really trying to find is a lifestyle of honesty
And honestly, it's got me caught in the middle
Of all these emotions I thought I could bottle and whittle
It's probably why I'm distant and talking so little
Cause it feels like I'm lost in an impossible riddle

So I'm living out this mismatch
Feeling twisted every minute in this shit trap
Bitching 'bout my barriers, and wishing I can get past
Until I act, I'll remain as this man
Who's walking two worlds, who isn't soldering the line
I'm sick of being tired, and bothered all the time
It's time to shape my life while I'm caught up in my prime
Time for me to change, and to swallow all my pride