Skankaerobics

Tired of those excess love handles
Are you so fat that you can't fall down
When you step on a scale
Does it say, "one at a time please"
If this sounds like you
You need the nation's hottest new workout video sensation
Skankaerobics
That's right, shed those pounds away with a high energy workout
Everyone's talking about
Before skankaerobics, whenever I took a shower
I had to use a blanket for a washcloth
With a shammy on a broom handle to reach the tough spots
But now I'm so skinny, my nipples touch
Thanks Skeletones
My doctor diagnosed me as morbidly obese and
Every time I grabbed the saddle the horses all started a-running
My wife said I smelled like moldy butter and dumpster juice in an old coffee can
And I got tired of carrying a gym bag
Full of baby powder to keep my wet spots at bay
But every since skankaerobics the chafing is gone
And shoot, I'm even breaking out the old spandex
From my glam-rock days
Thanks Skeletones
Skankaerobics, it's so simple anyone can do it
And we'll start you off easy
In phase one with one drop and rock steady
Phase two gets you into the skanking sounds of two tone
And in phase three you'll melt those pounds away
To the rocking sounds of the Skeletones
So ladies, trade those Boss Hoggs in
For some Daisy Dukes with the rudest new video workout sensation
Skankaerobics
Available now