She

We went out for drinks
And we have a lot in common
We both know a guy named Lucy
And he's ruining our lives
She goes to Wesleyan and she’s really loving college
English major who drinks earl grey tea
And masturbates to Bernie
Silence at the table when she gathers for Thanksgiving
Because grandpa has a racist streak the size of Mississippi
But who is she to argue? Is she even an adult?
No financial independence ‘cause her parents pay for school
It’s just me and her against the world, we’ll come out victorious

She took me to her place for some dinner with the family
An apartment on the UES, penthouse floor, golden doors
The Steinway grand piano in the living room’s to die for
She took lessons up ‘till middle school but hasn’t touched it since
Summer breaks in Haiti, yes she's quite the voluntourist
But she's moving down to Williamsburg
A real white feminist
The key to get her going is to mention Kylie J
Yeah, she’s up to date on culture but she's never heard of migos
She kicked me out right after
I’m afraid I got her mad
‘Cause she’s got some affluenza and I told her it looked bad