Second Week of Deer Camp

[gunshots]

Hey, you shot my cow!

It's the second week of deer camp
I got a swollen head
I'm lying with the dust balls
Underneath my bed

An icy breeze is blowing in
Through the tongue and groove
My pants are frozen to the floor
And I'm too sick to move

I didn't drink too many
Only turdy cans of beer
It must been that last shot
That put me under here

[Chorus]
It's the second week of deer camp
And all the guys are here
We drink, play cards, and shoot the bull
But never shoot no deer
The only time we leave the camp
Is when we go for beer
The second week of deer camp
Is the greatest time of year

I remember playin' poker
Dat weasel musta won
He's wearin' my new swampers
And sleepin' wit my gun

He's snoring like a chainsaw
Da camp smells like a dump
And someone's dirty underwear
Is hangin' on da pump

Mikku's in the wood box
Weiner's passed out on the stove
His flannel shirt is smoking
I wonder if he knows?

[repeat Chorus]

Vito's crawlin' t'rew da door
I think he got frostbite
He passed out in da outhouse
And he's been dere since last night

An' Goofus stumbles t'rew da door
He says he got a buck
He was comin' from da Wayside
An' he killed it wit' his truck

An' Moosty cracks a beer and says
"It's time to celebrate!
Goofus got the first buck
Since 1968!"

[repeat Chorus]