Scumday (Skit)

[Skit: Briggs]
Yo Paulie, good mornin' dude. Lou stop making that coffee. The coffee you made yesterday was trash. You're off duty. You're off duty when I'm in the store. All right? Whenever I'm in the store, whenever I'm visible to you, you don't have to work. All right, because you're shit at it. Paul, I need you to make my coffee. Make me a triple espresso, you know what I mean? Put that in a little cup and put that cup inside of the medium cup, all right. And put that medium cup inside the extra-large cup like a thermos. Do you know what I mean? [?] while I walk out of here. And when I walk out, Lou you clap 'cause then you're allowed to have your hands out of your pockets. When I walk out you just start clappin', alright? Give me my coffee. Don't look at me like that. Don't look at me like that. Don't even look at me when you give me the coffee. Thank you. You may look up. You know, you got a bunch of dickheads eatin'. White dudes with dreadlocks everywhere; it's fucked up. You know you're—you're riding the wave of fuckin' new age success mate. Look at you, you healthy little shit. You should try being me. You know what I mean? I got a stitch just breathing, you understand?