School Mam by The Stranglers
School Mam by The Stranglers

School Mam

The Stranglers * Track #11 On No More Heroes

School Mam Lyrics

A fine day for the classroom and the pupils are here
Timmy's got a headache but the others don't care
Sarah's got to stay behind and help with the drill
Teacher's got his eye on her moves in for the kill
Nobody can see or hear the things that they do
All the books are closed there must be something they do
Only teacher knows about the subjects they span span
Education's secondary - being a school mam

Oooey . . . teacher's doing fine as far as I can see

Being a school mam
Long holidays in the summer
Being a school mam
Free milk in your coffee breaks
Being a school mam
Government paid monthly salary cheques
Being a school mam

Noise is heard the principal investigates
She turns on all the cameras and it's too late
Catches both their pants down in a passion warm
Hasn't seen it happen since the day she was born
Reaches down for glasses that just can't be found
By the time she finds them - why they're down on the ground
Tossing and a'turning they've got feverish hands
Life can be so fluid when you're being a school mam

Oooey . . . teacher's doing fine as far as I can see

Being a school mam
Controlling promiscuity after hours
Being a school mam
Giving out detentions by the dozen
Being a school mam
Give her fifty lines (of speed)
Being a school mam

Sucking on her fingernails she can't believe what she's seen
She seems so engrossed at what appears on the screen
Locks her door with trembling hands and her heart's beating very fast
She pretends she's down there on the floor in the class
Gives herself to teacher although he doesn't know
Works herself into a frenzied state and it shows
Sarah's almost at the top but try as she can
She can't reach her helter skelter down with the school mam
Just watch her go and help her try if you can
Use your twentieth century imagination if you've got any

Oooey . . . now she's at the top and teacher sets her free

Being a school mam
Disgusting behaviour
Being a school mam
All over the parquet flooring
Being a school mam
Let the flood gates open wide
Being a school mam

Now the principal collapses dead on the floor
With contentment on her wrinkled old face ever more
She went out the very best way that an old woman can
She was where the action was down there with the school mam

Oooey . . . teacher never will discover who could see

Being a school mam
One and one make two if you are very lucky
Being a school mam
Two twos make four if I remember correctly
Being a school mam
Four fours make sixteen and sixteen's over age
Sixteen and sixteen make thirty-two, that's approaching middle age
Thirty-two and thirty-two make sixty-four, that's OAP land
Sixty-four and sixty-four make a-hundred-and-twenty-eight
A-hundred-and-twenty-eight divided by three
Let me pause for reflection for a second
But teacher
Three does not go into one-hundred-and-twenty-eight exactly;
But it goes forty-two and a bit;
43, 44, 45, 46, 47, 48, 49, 49. 1, 49.2, 49.3, 49.4, 49.5, 49.6, 49.7
49.8, 49.9 (X9)
Fifty

School Mam Q&A

Who wrote School Mam's ?

School Mam was written by Jet Black (Stranglers drummer) & Dave Greenfield & Jean-Jacques Burnel & Hugh Cornwell.

Who produced School Mam's ?

School Mam was produced by Martin Rushent.

When did The Stranglers release School Mam?

The Stranglers released School Mam on Fri Sep 23 1977.

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