Scars

One
If I could I would nail these hands to the edges of stars. I would sacrifice this body to the sky hoping to resurrect as someone spiteful enough to not care about you anymore.

Two
Staple me to a cross. Pierce my side with a broken promise and I will bleed all the crippled reasons why you deserve one more chance.

Three
Loving you was the last thing I felt really good at.

Four
You wanna know how I got these scars? I ripped every last piece of you out of my smile.

Five
I whispered you stardust.

Six
I spoke you into sunflowers.

Seven
I dipped my hands in forever. I Touched you infinity, Treated you as if you were the last molecule of oxygen inside of a gas chamber. I was good to you.

Eight
You wanna know how I got these scars? I swallowed my pride and then it clawed its way out of my mouth.

Nine
I realized I was never really your boyfriend. I was just your hype man.

Ten
I hope your next boyfriend gets smallpox.

Ten
Yes I said smallpox!

Ten
I hate you!

Ten
But I miss you!

Ten
I love you!

Ten
It’s hard for me to count when I get emotional.

Ten
I heard that 90% of human interaction is nonverbal so

[Pause]

Ten
If I could I would tie your arms to a daydream and then auction you off to my fondest memories.

See I wrote this poem in my own spinal fluid, I put it on the backbone of a white flag so before you read it you’ll already know that I've given up. I’ll just keep you here. Shackled to the most important chapter of my life story pressed into the basement of my eyelids like liquid salvation so I remember you beautiful with amazing underneath your wings and an orchid smile, you gorgeous earthquake. You cracked hourglass with sand spilling from behind your ribs, you wasted my time

How dare you linger on my lips and then kiss me like a stuttering apology with excuses stapled to the roof of your mouth. I still remember you like a dream tattooed to the inner walls of a long term memory but some days I wonder if you existed at all.
And of course, you wanna know how I got these scars.

I got these scars the day I fell in love with you.
I landed face first.